Heh heh, they don't need any office help, do they?

Subject from a recent piece of spam: "Make Money Sitting on your Butt !!!!"

My reply: "I already do. I sit for 7 or so hours a day doing my job." :)

Since registering my domain name, I've been getting a lot of e-mail from Taiwan. The subject of the most recent one:

BAR¦¨¤H¼v*µ¤¤¤ß¤»¤ë·s¼W³qª¾ @@¨C¤ù¤@«ß40¤¸@@

:)

Usually, I delete these before they open. Sometimes, I'll wind up opening them...most of the time I can never read them, since they are in Chinese. But I happened to open this one (to see if it looked like the subject line above), and it had a naked woman...god, I hope it wasn't an underage girl. :(

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Today's interesting subject line: "Your a winner," then some b.s. about getting a loan.

Sycamore sez: "Thank you. I do real well job."

This is too funny.

Subject: Ralph Waldo Emerson
Date: Thu, 04 Jul 2002 14:58:36 -0400
From: idiot@stoopnagel.com

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Oh shit...this African scam is getting better and better.

URGENT AND CONFIDENTIAL

ATTN: MANAGING DIRECTOR/C.E.O

DR. AMIR YUNZER (this is for you, Mike :) )

LAGOS - NIGERIA


REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

I will advise that you read thoroughly and carefully, through this mail.

This transaction is highly confidential and 100% risk free. It should be strictly between you and me.Note clearly that this transaction has been well planned and masterminded by my colleagues and I. We have followed all the required official contract award/payment procedures, and all documents to facilitate the smooth conclusion of this transaction are legitimate and officially in order. There is no problem, this contract is LEGAL. THIS TRANSACTION IS A BUSINESS DEAL BETWEEN YOU AND US, BUT IT IS LEGITIMATE AND GENUINE TO THE AUTHORITIES. I want to assure you that you have nothing to fear about, your main priority should be to give us your total co-operation, and follow our advice /instruction. You should consider this transaction as already successful & concluded. This transaction is for real, its no Childs play. As the Chairman of the Committee I hereby solicit strongly for your total co-operation and confidentiality, in this transaction and also hope that you will not betray the confidence that we have reposed on you, for you will benefit immensely from this transaction.

Please send us the following information's:

(a)company name and Beneficiary of account

(b) Your Personal TeL. Number and Fax Number

(c) Bank account/Sort/ABA/Routing numbers were the funds will be transfered to.

(d) Your Bankers Address, Telephone and Fax Number.

We need this information to enable us award the
contract in your name/company name and prepare letters of claim in your name/ company name as the N.N.P.C foreign sub-contractor and sole beneficiary to the contract payment and then forward it to the appropriate quarters for N.N.P.C payment approval before we now finally submit all the details to the Central Bank of Nigeria for processing of final payment approvals/remittance of the contract sum of US$21.5M into the bank account provided by you.

We have agreed to share the money thus:

1. 20% for the Account owner (you)

2. 70% for us (The officials)

3. 10% to be used in settling taxation and all
local and foreign expenses.

Consider this transaction as successful and completed for we have taken care of all modalities and official procedures involved legitimately and as required.

Note clearly that as top Government officials in Nigeria, occupying very sensitive top Government position we receive little salaries compared to our positions, and we are not allowed to operate Foreign Bank account. You will assist us to receive this money into your Bank account; our own share of the fund will be invested into a lucrative business in your country and part of it into Telecommunication in Japan. As soon as the fund is transferred into your Bank account, we will travel down to your country for disbursement according to the agreed percentage. Once more I want you to understand that this transaction is 100% risk free.

For security reasons , I will advise you reach me on my email address : (blockhead@toolbag.com) or the email box I used in sending you this letter and as time goes on I will give to you my personal phone number . Do not ever send any mail to any other e-mail address except these.

My colleagues and I are highly respected in our country. We have our reputation to protect. We will appreciate it that this transaction remains between ONLY YOU IN PERSON AND ME.Confidentiality should be our watchword. We appreciate all your efforts and look forward to a mutual business relationship with you, built on trust and co-operation in which we shall all benefit immensely from. I look forward to receiving your reply, along with your complete Bank account details and detailed information about your Company. Thanks for your co-operation, I await your quick reply today.

Yours faithfully,

Amir Yunzer.

Note, I will explain to you better when I hear from you.

--
Alright:

1) First, if you want to scam me, at least give me details, you pinhead.

2) Though I am the CEO of The Sycamore Group, that is merely in my head and in my own little world...how the hell did you find out?

3) If you keep babbling about how legit this shit is, the less likely I am to believe that it is.

4) Who wants to take bets on where the next one will come from? So far, we have South Africa, Sierra Leone, and Nigeria. I'm going to go with Gabon, Equatorial Guinea, or Ghana. :)

5) $10 says that this shit is now being propagated by good ol' US citizens.

6) Most people call this the Nigerian scam. That really sucks b/c I'm sure most Nigerians are good people. We have a growing Nigerian community here in Philadelphia that was featured in last week's Philadelphia Weekly.

Syc, you scumbag ... posting his private correspondence in the Cellar. You can't be trusted to keep this personalized spam confidential. ;)

Yeah, I need to watch out for the Nigerian mafia now. :)

So I get this e-mail the other day that looks like this:

From: Administrator
Subject: Re: Your Student Loans

Now I was pretty sure this was fake, but was curious, so I looked at it...sure enough, it was a stoopid fucking promo for consolidating student loans.

This makes me wonder though: Did I get that e-mail just for shits and grins (b/c I'm on some marketer's list), or do they actually KNOW that I have a student loan? And if the latter is the case, that would piss me off. I know that some states will sell your information to advertisers, but I didn't think the Feds would...and my loans are only from the government.

Strange...

The creativity never ceases to amaze me. :)

--
hi, i saw your profile and it sounded interesting, well it was more like a user profile than an ad so i couldn't tell if seeking a relationship or not, if it's a meeting your looking for so am i. i'd like to send a picture but i don't know how to do much on the computer so i can't send you one direct.i figured out a way to do it online, i had a friend help me put one on a personals site along with a full profile.

just go on down,take a look and if you like the way i look then i guess we can take the next step. the site is in the link below, i think you will like my profile cause it's kind of sexy, but don't worry it's not a porno site, ( what kind of girl do you think i am!! LOL!! ) it's just on the sexy side, and i used it because it's a little out of the way, which reduces the chances of people i know stumbling across it. well bye for now.

hope to talk soon,
jenifer342

www.threehornyhousewives.org

It appears I was wrong...another one from Nigeria. :)

--
Attn.,

First, I must solicit your strictest confidence in this transaction. This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly confidential and "top secret". We are top officials of the Federal
Government Contract Review Panel who are interested in importation of goods into our country with funds that are presently trapped in Nigeria. In order to commence this
business, we solicit your assistance to enable us transfer into your account the said-trapped funds.

The source of the fund is as follows: During the regime of the last Military transitional government of Gen. Abdulsalami Abubakar, government officials set up companies and awarded themselves contracts which were grossly over invoiced in various ministries. The present democratic government of President Olusegun Obasanjo set up the Contract Review Panel and we have identified a lot of inflated contract funds that are presently floating in the Central Bank of Nigeria ready for payment. However, by virtue of our position as civil servants and members of this panel, we cannot acquire this money in our names. I have therefore been delegated as a matter of trust by my colleagues in the panel, to look for an oversea partner into whose account we would transfer the sum of US$31,320,000.00 (Thirty-One Million, Three Hundred and Twenty thousand United States Dollars) in which we hope to use in purchasing Agro Allied equipment, and to enable us to own properties and invest in the stable economy of your country. Hence, we are sending you this email message. We have agreed to share the money thus:


1. 20% for the account owner (you)
2. 70% for us (the officials of the CRP)
3. 10% to be used in settling taxation and all local and foreign expenses.

Please acknowledge receipt of this message for proper briefing on the safe modality for the execution by strictly sending your aceptance to both emails accounts: stupidphuck11
@lycos.com and stupidphuck11@excite.com

Yours faithfully
Dr. Stu Pidass

NOTE: PLEASE QUOTE THIS REFERENCE NUMBER (RB/07/02) IN ALL YOUR REPONSE.

I swear this is exactly as it arrived.
 

Dear :

Your name was referred to me!

Work From Home using Mail Order or Internet
Put your Personal Computer to work for you!

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While you are at work or asleep!

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Thank you.

Jason
2002-07-15

I've gotten one similar to that before. You Canadians get ripped off though...they offer us $5000 down here. ;)

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