'Barbarism is the natural state of mankind,' the borderer said, still staring somberly at the Cimmerian. 'Civilization is unnatural. It is a whim of circumstance. And barbarism must always ultimately triumph.' -Robert E. Howard, Beyond The Black River

So, Tiger and Phil did the ppv golf match, which did not entertain, as I understand it. Anyway, Phil topped Tiger and when it was all over Phil took away a cool $9,000,000.

At Jordan Spieth's wedding, country singer Jake Owen stepped in Phil's ass over the $30 it cost him to watch "the shittiest golf ever"..."you couldn't even make three birdies between the two of you?". He asked Phil to pay him back the $29.99, and apologize for the shitty golf.

Phil pulls a wad of hundies out of his pocket, peels one off, and says:

That's my new sports hero, right there.:notworthy