I DID read that, UT. And do you know that to this very day that song brings back the memory of long ago pain. I have all the words by heart, just like every other song on that CD. When I saw your post, I flinched mentally and quickly went on to the next. Your reply was too clever by half!

I congratulate you on having the good taste to not only listen to Chris Issak, but to remember his lyrics as well.

(Is my nose turning brown? ;))

Sam, don't forget you use the term "blood libel" when somebody does away with this loser and everyone blames you..... :lol:

I feel good now Sammy, thank you! (But no use brown-nosing me, as I have no power or goods to offer in return. If I did, I would disperse them equally amongst all the brown-nosers, er, Dwellars I like.)

The song always gave me a double take. Whoa, Chris Isaak did a one-nighter with that chick and she became a nun! He actually ruined her for all other men! I think I listened to the original once and it seemed just a horribly sexist thing in the original context.

Update (warning, rant follows)

OK, this is not going to turn out well. I am rapidly attaining the status of main dish even though I keep turning down the dinner invitations.

I won't pick up the phone when the caller ID shows that it's Glen. He retaliates by leaving long messages on my voice mail. He tells me that I "am loved," and reads me stuff he has written, including poetry (he IS a very good writer). He expresses concern for me and tells me funny stories about his day.

After listening to a few of these voice mails, I am softened up enough to finally answer when he calls. He expresses delight to finally speak with me at last, recalls the good times we shared together in the old days, is witty and self deprecating and very sexy in an understated way. The telephone lines from Arizona to Colorado must be fairly sizzling when we talk.

He has even enlisted his family in the cause. I have spoken with his sister on the phone and on FaceBook. She comes off as a very nice person. Glen 's youngest son also chats with me from time. I am still fond of that kid!

Yes, I know that I should get an unlisted number, change my e-mail, and not go NEAR FaceBook for at least the next 20 years. I should distract myself with cleaning the kitty litter box, thinking uplifting thoughts and even seeking out silver foxes on an Internet dating site - they may all be scoundrels, but at least they haven't PROVED it to me yet. Or maybe I could start sending sultry PM's to Urbane Guerilla.

I could write a self help book titled "Women who by LAW should be prevented from relationships - the true story of SamIam's amazing romantic misadventures."

So Glen's plan is to go visit his son's family back in our old home town, then come to Cortez to finish me off. I don't understand why he is putting all this energy into my demise. Up to now I was minding my own business and not hurting anybody - OK, I did send a few sarcastic replies to would-be online silver foxes, but that was it.

I have one question. I'd like to ask Glen to re-arrange his schedule and come see me before he goes to visit his son. Why drag this thing out? He is quite capable of carrying out in less than a week whatever diabolical plan he has in mind. I, of course, will spend the next year or two recovering. But I want to get this entire sordid affair over with and go on with my so-called life as soon as possible. Why stretch things out? Strike when the iron is hot and all that.

Do you think he would agree to this? Or would he just get mad and vanish again, only to reappear when we're both 70?

Sincerely,
Sleepless in Cortez

Tell him you've gone lesbo and your SO is not happy with the situation.... Worked 1x with me and a guy who wouldn't take a hint.

Honestly I don't think it'll be good for you to meet up with him again, but its your choice to make. If he *really* wants to see you all that bad, he'll rearrange. If he doesn't and decides to blow you off again, well that's probably best anyway.

Sam - it's the thrill of the chase.
My Evil Ex used to reel me back in every time with this sort of attention. And after a while (the timescale went from months, to weeks, to days, to hours) he'd have what he wanted and switch it all off again. Or generally transfer it to another woman. In fact towards the end he didn't even wait until I'd left his flat before starting gooey conversations with "just a friend".

I don't think he will change his plans if you're softening. He'll find it more useful to talk you round. If you are capable of issuing an ultimatum and sticking to it you might get rid of him sooner rather than later. But don't expect him to take no for an answer. He'll more likely let you stew for a few days then phone up pretending the two of you were still on for meeting after he had seen his son all along.

I could be way off beam, but his behaviour just sounds so distressingly familiar to me.

He's got your number, in more ways than one.

Playah, or so it seems to me.

Thats my thought, too

Sam, you seem to be enjoying this....you might as well be the one calling all the shots. You tell him what to do and when to do it. If he doesn't follow through, no loss right?

Seems there's a bit of "Come-hither, Get-thee-away" working in both directions here.

Thrill of the chase, and the first thing that occurred to me is how the brain works on remembering your past. Remembers the good bits, and cherishes them; forgets the bad bits because who wants to dwell on that?

And so maybe he remembers the good bits, and forgets why it didn't really work at the time.

Wow sometimes i think how great it would be to go back to my college days. Good times! All the terrible bouts of depression and anxiety and desperation and confusion... I'm sure that wouldn't happen if I was young again and had another crack at it!

I have this great memory of the semester I spent abroad in Germany in college. I mean, it was honestly the best evar.

Last night, I was flipping through my journal from that time. And first of all, I had plenty of time to fill a journal then, so what does that say? And second, on most days my only entry was something like "skipped class today. Was bored, so I went for a really long walk."

Now I have pictures from then, and they show me having a good time, and I have lots of memories where I had a good time, But I'd completely forgotten all those times when I was bored and lonely and walking for miles with no particular destination.

That is what this "relationship" is a long walk with no destination. If I understand this correctly (he dumped you and the child?), it is a terrible game for a child to have to watch. No way should a kid be put through that kind of bullshit.

Hang on, back up.

He had a daughter, whom he abandoned along with you. He also has a son? Where does this second kid fit into the timeline?

Both kids lived with us, but Jed, the younger son, kind of did his own thing and wasn't around so much. Jed is definately the favorite child. When Glen split, he tried to take Jed with him, but the Mom threatened to charge Glen with kidnapping if he took Jed across state lines, so Jed came back. (Yes, there was plenty of high drama)

It has it moments, I'll certainly grant you that, and I have to joke about it - the whole thing is just so bizarre.

But it is also very upsetting and I haven't even told half the story - it would take forever to explain it all. I can't understand why I still feel so vulnerable to this man. Its dysfunctional to the max. :dunce:

I know I'll work thru it eventually. I appreciate you guys letting me vent about it!

Back up? How about put the car in PARK?