Nothing strange about it, when you realize "nursing home" is a euphemism for "prison for old people".

Mmmhmm...right. That's what they ALL say. ;)

The stated focus of prisons is to "rehabilitate" criminals and return them to society. (yeah, I know that this ain't the case. I deal with the prison population a lot. Can you say "high recidividism rate"? Good... knew you could).

I also deal a lot with nursing homes. It is more appropriate, IMHO, to use this as a euphemism for "warehouse where we put old people until they die."

As an aside ... there is an 'elder care' facility near my house. Their sign out front describes their specialty: "Assisted Living for the Memory Impaired."

That just struck me as funny. It becomes funnier when you know that they put anklets on their clients that function like those anti-shoplifting tags on the expensive clothes in the shops in the mall. Resident tries to elope through a doorway ... alarms go off and they round him/her up.

For each of my 3 kids (born 13, 11 and 9 years ago at lovely Johns Hopkins Hosp.) I had to buy a phone for the room. There were no set-up or installation charges, just the $5-$7 for the cheepie phone. Each came home as a souveneir of the "big day" and when they're old enough for phones in their rooms (a day that's coming all too soon, I fear), I'll give 'em to them for a laugh.

I must say, given what we know about the high likelihood of catching some dreadful disease at the hospital, I didn't mind paying for a clean phone.


BTW, [feeling sorry] I'm up typing at 3:20 am because one of said offspring had an upset stomach, with all the ensuing clean-up. I've wiped, mopped, and scrubbed, and now I'm hosing the area down with alcohol -- who knew a kid could hold so much? [/for self]

Hoo Boy. Tomorrow is the big day. :eek: And I've foolishly squandered my last few minutes of consumption. Midnight came sooner than I expected, and I'm now NPO. I hadn't actually planned ahead for the pre-surgery binge. It was too busy at work tonight. At least I got to scoot out earlier than usual, so I could get to bed (not sleeping ... I'm too anxious to sleep) earlier than usual.

Surgery is tomorrow (I guess it's now actually this) morning at 1115 EST.

Hopefully I will come away from this experience with some outrageously funny stories to tell.

Good luck Wolf! Hope everything goes well. :)

In my community, we usually 'send energies' to people who are going through a medical procedure, but not without their express consent.

If you don't want any sort of psychic or magickal energies sent your way, how about a pack of AA's?

Seriously, good luck...in a couple of weeks, your problem will be all gone and you'll have another fun hospital story to share! Yay!:p

good luck =)

Now, what sort of piracy should we engage in here? When the Wolfs away...

What do you think Wolf is doing right now?

Sleeping off the barbituates?

--"God, this pain is unbearable! Where's my gun? I'm gonna get that doctor!"

--*blissed out on drugs*

--Inattentive to the world around her, due to being deep into playing Game Boy.

Praying to her particular deity to make the urge to cough, sneeeze or laugh go away.

I'm praying...
 

I believe there is a God and He can help (or compleatly) heal you. So I'm praying for you Wolf! May your road to recovery be swift, and may God bless the Doctor's hands that are working on you to be swift and steady.

on a semi-different note:<br>while we're waiting to hear back from Wolf:
 

Ever notice how we're one of the few species that drinks another species milk (it isn't healthy for kittens either), And how whenever you hear <a href="http://www.google.com/search?q=Milk,+It+does+a+Body+good&sourceid=opera&num=0&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8">"Milk, It does a Body good"</a>[a Google search] those adds are Paid for by the <a href="http://www.nationaldairycouncil.org/">people who make money from the selling of Milk</a>. And for the fact that multiple Medical issues arise from the over abundance of Calcium in your system. I've heard that <a href="http://www.niddk.nih.gov/health/kidney/pubs/whastone/whastone.htm">Kidney Stones</a> are caused by it and so is <a href="http://www.alzheimers.org/pubs/adfact.html">Alzheimer's Disease</a> (the plaque is calcium based, but that's just a hypothosis Doc's arn't sure what realy causes the Plaque). even <a href="http://www.osteo.org/newfile.asp?doc=fast&doctitle=Fast+Facts+on+Osteoporosis&doctype=HTML+Fact+Sheet">Osteoporosis</a> can be prevented by <a href="http://www.notmilk.com/calbones.html">Milk is a construed lie</a>. I don't mind a glass of milk once in a while but the idea of Milk being a staple to any one's diet concerns me.
<br>
so when case said:and the fact that Calcium is one of the main ingredents to <a href="http://www.tumscalciumforlife.com/">Tums</a> this doesn't suprise me. But what is a 12 year old doing eating alot of Tums anyways?<br><br> This may be a bit off topic but the cause of <a href="http://www.niddk.nih.gov/health/digest/pubs/gallstns/gallstns.htm">gallstones</a> [cholesterol] isn't too far from milk.<br> check <a href="http://www.notmilk.com/">this site out</a> for more reasons why milk ain't that great for you. If your looking for calcium.. look twards vegtables there's more digestable calcium in a tree of broccoli than there is in an entire gallon of Milk.
<br><br><br>
<i>----------------------------------------------------------
Just hoping you will look at who's telling you to eat it, just as much as why you eat it.</i>