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WTF? What's your general attitude toward casual sex? |
^WHS^ funny - that caught my {eye} too.
@Ali. yup that's about the age nowadays. Frightening. I think you covered it pretty well. This may be one of those situations where a guy's perspective will be better received. (Insert Dazza here) |
Ali I really wanted to have sex with my boyfriend when I was 15 and he was 16.
We went pretty much all the way there. Unprotected. We were both intelligent, educated and well aware of birth control and how to obtain it, but the sheer rush of hormones at that age is so hard to control. He came from a strict Baptist family, I came from a Catholic one. Neither of our parents ever found out how close we'd come to sex and both would have been appalled. We would have been considered dirty, out of control, bestial. I can't imagine being on the parental side of the fence. As a 15 yo I thought it natural, wonderful, exciting and the best feeling I had ever experienced. As an adult, wondering whether you are "condoning" something harmful to your child must be agonising. All I can suggest is keep thinking it through, keep loving him and keep encouraging him to talk, even though that will make him squirm. And for goodness sake encourage him to put one on. Just because this girl is special and right and truthful about protection, not every girl will be. And if he doesn't get in the habit of wearing a condom he's into a statistics game that can have life-changing consequences. Look at what happened to my niece. She didn't learn first time round and is now going through the baby blues with a vengeance. She's been hit with the clarity hammer; this isn't like grinding away for an exam, where you get a round of applause, a certificate and a nice long rest before starting again. This is now 24/7 responsibility. He's a good boy and you're a good parent. And very few 15 year old boys behave well to ex girlfriends. Too much testosterone, pride and a certain amount of immaturity (especially as you now know sex was in the mix). You talked to him about it - he'll get through that phase with a woman's perespective on hand. She's obviously forgiven him for that part at least. Try not to hurt yourself too much over this. |
I'm with you Ali. I feel like its too young, but we can't deny reality. Is M's mom going to be rational about this or are the kids going to be pushed into sneaking around?
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Biologically, they are ready for this.
Psychologically and emotionally ... maybe. But most people do most things without being really ready for them, and survive. Socially, it would be a boost for him, and I think nowdays for her too - provided it's just one guy. Legally, they're both underage, but given that they're the same age, the police probably wouldn't do anything. So, as a non-parent, I wouldn't be too worried about it, provided they are double safe - pill and condoms. Even properly used, condoms have a failure rate. Better they are doing it in a house where they are safe than some dodgy teen hangout by the old sewage works or whatever. |
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Fix your face
•spoken in to my phone |
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But I did learn the hard way that many people don't feel this way. I had one early boyfriend who, in retrospect, I think I probably pushed into it too soon, not by actually pushing but by being so casual about the topic that he may have felt he needed to rise to the challenge (nyuck nyuck nyuck.) Another one had massive insecurities and a significant need for nurturing, and our relationship largely dissolved because I didn't realize I was supposed to be providing that until it was way too late. Quote:
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The challenge I have is not approving of it happening at all, and not wanting to encourage it by providing a 'safe place' for them to have sex. I'm not going to just say, yeah go ahead and do it in my house, but I suppose they will when they think no one's around, and I can't really help that other than to make them stay in the communal areas all the time and be constantly supervised, and honestly, I don't think that sort of behaviour breeds trust or maturity. I don't know. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things all work out. And now for more good news. Mav has finally found himself a girlfriend, but she's a couple of years older! She's a lovely girl though, and I don't care about the age difference really, but I imagine I'll be dealing with the whole sex issue fairly constantly from now on. *sighs* I'm too old for this shit! |
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:p: |
I know, right? And yet for some reason, most of my boyfriends' parents have disliked me. Go figure.
Aden's girlfriend is very pretty, by the way Ali. At least if she did get pregnant they'd make some really good looking babies... |
Yeah, I guess that's one plus. lol I'd rather not contemplate that idea too much though.
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