I'm doing more suitable work now helping parents address the behaviors of their children with autism. It's interesting getting fully back into that community. These kids are just so interesting. The hippie school has been suggested to me by various cow-orkers but I'm not a regulatory hurdles kind of guy.

Today and, frankly, every day. It's been two years and I still have not gotten used to my vision with the field cut. I used to cheer myself up by thinking one day I'll realize that I just don't notice it or think about it any more. I wished it would be a shorter term but knew it was more likely to be years. It's never going to happen. :cry:

Shit Monster. What is your FOV now?

It's hard to explain. Whatever I am focusing on, I don't see the pie slice from around 9:30 to 11:30 on a clock face. but my brain fills in a sort of fuzz that's the average color of what I am looking at. Its like looking at a scene containing the Predator. or through glasses with a permanent grease smudge. I feel like Midas in that everything I try to look at turns to fuzz and an inverse Medusa in that I can't look directly at anything and see it because it turns to crap. As I travel through my day it feels disorienting like being on a ship except that I'm not unsteady, just my vision is. And it's such hard work to make sure I'm scanning properly and don't miss things. And it's heartbreaking when I'm relaxing so not paying that attention and realize that I have missed stuff. Like Hector tried to high-five me over my shoulder when he was sat behind me and we were playing a family game and I completely didn't see it. Misreading words and making amusing new versions because I'm speed-reading and I didn't see the first letter and my brain just filled in the blank with something that worked is not as funny anymore

Sorry, monster. :(

and just in case you were thinking maybe I'm maudlin because I've had a beer or two, it's not yet 6pm and even I don't usually start that early ;) Oh well. I needed to get it into words. maybe that will help in itself. thanks guys.

That must be profoundly annoying, I get pissed off at floaters so I can only imagine what the is like.

It sounds like you have about 90 degrees of visual field.

Jesus how annoying.

No. It's not like that. Look at the words below.


Fuck Fu ndered lonely as a cloud
Fuck Fuck ooth what have I done
Fuck Fuck Funny how it worksn't
See Fuckety wouldn't offend me
how this Fuck even if I were the
properest fucker of all. As long as

I focused on the center of the text. No bad words would jump out and draw my attention to focus on them. And if they did, once I refocused, all I would see was "uck" or "iuck"

I have a full field of vision, there is nothing wrong with my eyes. But after the information is in and processed, the bit about that part of the picture is not transmitted to the brain. or if it is, the brain is unable to interpret it.

Sorry monster. It sounds like the lack of hope is the worst part.

well it's certainly not helping ;) I still hope that there will come a day when I am so used to it that it doesn't bother me, but I thought a couple of years would be a reasonable and realistic timeframe. Fortunately, it doesn't happen to enough people (who survive for many years afterwards) for there to be any helpful data on such things. :/

Last summer I had a blood sugar incident over 1500. We caught it and got control, but added a number of large bat signals (floaters).

Jesus, that's nothing like I imagined from your previous mentions in passing of vision problems. Sounds like there's no way to compensate except go very slow and be extra cautious. I don't think that's your style at all. While you're waiting for a miracle maybe you can work out some eye/brain exercises that might help you compensate more quickly. Not giving up, mind you, just busy work.

I feel bad for you but I won't babble on, because I don't want to blow our cover of sterner stuff. ;)
On the up side, if you ever see me, you won't have to see all of me.

1500 Bruce?!!! Holy crap!

Yeah, that was a shocker, especially since I'd been seeing the doctor and been tested every three months for a few years.
It was easily controlled once discovered, and we still don't know what caused this sudden change in metabolism.

Of course the doctors always wonder if you're not telling them about a week long party with Capt. Jack or Miss Oreo, and I suppose some people do that. But I figure this guy works for me, would I not tell my cook I hate Broccoli? Give him all the information so he can do his best for me.
That way I'm confident I'm ignoring only the best advice. :haha:

Our deadliest enemy is denial, which has nothing to do with Egypt.