Good to hear :)

F*CK CANCER
 

The appointment Mum couldn't miss (referred to in the Bumming your Stone thread) was the results of a cancer check-up. I kinda knew it was, because I couldn't think of anything else as important that she wanted to keep secret.

What I didn't know is that she'd been having pain for a few weeks, in a specific location (part of her breast.)

Results today.
She has breast cancer. Again.

It's been caught early, as it was last time. But last time I was living with them and could help, even though sometimes she felt I was more of a hindrance...

I've done most of my crying. Away from her of course.
And I did what I was ostensibly here to do - look after Dads, take him shopping and make sure he had his medication with food at the right time.

But bloody hell. I wasn't prepared for this,
And no, I know it's not a death sentence. But it shakes my world to its core. And I shake enough anyway.
All my thoughts are with Mum though. She has Dad and me to worry about, let alone her own health (this is the order in which she'll think about things).
I love her very much.

Fuck Cancer. :mad:

Shine on, that's horrible on top of everything else. I know she'll be ok, that they caught it early, but it's bloody unfair she (and you) has to deal with this crap.

*hugs*

Fuck cancer

:(

I'm sorry Sundae. That's horrible.

That sucks.

Glad it was caught early... Still. Once people start adding the word "again" to breast cancer and legitimately been able to sing "hello breast cancer my old friend I've come to cry from you again"... Can't something be done to stop the repeats? If not an outright mastectomy then at least emptying them from mammary glands and replacing them with whatever plastic surgeons use these days... IDK, there has to be something that's more practical then having a seasonal on/off relationship with something that horrible.

Mum's immediate reaction? "Take it off - take both of them off if necessary."
But that's not appropriate for the type of cancer, apparently.

I don't know why and I won't pretend - all I know is what she told me, Mum would have them lopped off without a second thought if it would help, but has been told it won't.

Fuck cancer.

Sent by thought transference

I'm sorry, Sundae. You all deserve hugs.

shit

Fucking fuck. So sorry Sundae. :(

She had her first appointment today.
It's Grade 3. For people who haven't had experience with cancer, that's teh serious. Not the worst, I admit. But still more serious than we all thought.

It may be a full mastectomy AND chemo AND that might not work anyway.
But they have to let patients know the worst case scenario, so it might not be as bad as that.
Initial surgery scheduled for 7-8 October. Mum wants me there to look after Dad, and in case she comes home and there's complications (hemorrhage was suggested as a potential.) However slight the possibility is, Dads would not know what to do if that happened.

Christmas in London may be cancelled.
I laughed it off to Mum, wanting her to know I didn't care and she was more important.
I will cry if we can't go though. Because the above is true - she is FAR more important than a silly hotel visit. It's just I know what she's invested in it - how important it was for her, to have a special Christmas while Dad was still capable of dealing with it - even if he didn't remember it.

Sorry that I'm being all maudlin.
I know I'm not the only person with things to deal with here.
I'm just laying it out as I feel it, trying to cope with it without the old poor me, poor me, pour me another.

Not maudlin. Facing up to shit and feeling teh sad. This is allowed. In fact this is the place for all that. Massive cyber-hugs, dear! X


Sent by thought transference