The mystery beast is attracted to menstrual blood, therefore only persons with developed breasts need be worried?

I think it is a sign on the planet LV223 and warns of this danger!

Hey, kids! Look! It's Mr. Balls!!

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And remember, kids...Always Honoré de Balzac.

NO FORKING way.

A 70-year-old Canberra man came to an extraordinarily painful fork in the road when he presented to Canberra Hospital's Emergency Department with a 10cm fork lodged in his penis.

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/hea...-1226699880200

Of course you know he fell on it while he was cleaning the silverware naked.

Obviously you are referring to the giant walking pair of testes, and not our Shadow Chancellor, Ed Balls.

Hang on...

~Frank Costanza

what's worse are the photos of them removing the damn thing. google it. i'm not a postin' that one. freakin' nasty!

Ya know whut? I'm gonna take philthy's advice.

I've been fighting the urge to call and ask how they know it wasn't consensual...

Attachment 45282

I'm giving in to the urge to ask out loud why they named their horse "son".

less wtfnsfw and more LOLnsfw:

Attachment 45287

He must be doing something right, her tongue's hanging out.

Attachment 45318

she just thinks she's miley cyrus!

Hah!

If you see one like this, RUN.

Attachment 45352

*that one* probably does taste like fish

That was too funny. I don't think I'd be able to keep from bursting into laughter if I encountered that in a grocery store - and everyone would be looking at me thinking I was daft.

That'll be fun to eat...

Is that a Brazilian salmon?

hahahaha

"Give it to me! Give it!!"

I bet!

It's a doubleheader, too.

.Attachment 45741

When my eldest son was about five, we helped our best friends move. Stephen found the lady's vibrator, and ran through the assembled group of friends standing in the garage with it held high above his head, making swishing noises and yelling "Spaceship!"

this is an odd thread

Yes, yes it is.

:welcome: to the Cellar Jake!

Started to put this in 'Questionable Headlines', but decided not to take the chance...

Attachment 45780

ETA: Wait, are they on the same team? Ball team, I mean.

That editor has a sense of humor.

Is she out?

um what?

Attachment 45801

Wow. Really?

Terrifying.

Holy cow. I went and looked it up, because I was hoping he said it maybe back in the 80s, or even the 90s... but no. He said it in January of 2012. At least we can be comforted that he is only a state senator, and only from Tennessee. Probably not the most offensive thing to be said by a politician in that state, anyway.

Why can't people like that ever get a tap on the noggin from a little lead buddy when they appear in public?

Because they are clearly no threat to go any further. That QUOTE is his career's little lead buddy.

Great euphemism, by the way.

No further, he'll just stay there gerrymandering to make sure like minded assholes do go further. :(

I'll just leave this here. Bizarre doesn't even come close...

Urgh. It's like Aphex Twin on soma.

I won't be scsbfuubscribing.

W.T.F.F???

That might have made sense if I was STONED.

I was...it didn't.

:lol2:

It was funny though...I kept hearing "herp derp derp herp derp"...

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The Christian Science Society of Dixon, Illinois, could not have gotten more literal if they tried — which they supposedly didn't when they constructed a church that looks from a certain angle like a giant phallus, complete with balls and bushy pubes.

Up front, the "gathering place" looks like any old non-penile structure, but from God's eye view things get a whole lot less pious.

The congregation, which may want to rethink its slogan "rising up," has yet to respond to the controversy surrounding their phallic facade, but they'll be forced to answer for it soon enough.

Hahaha haha

Ha!

It makes perfect sense to me. Except it's called 'late for meeting' and I don't understand what meeting he, it, that thing, is late for. I mean, the way he farts around of course he's late for stuff. Otherwise, I totally get it. :unsure:

Magnificent!

His tailor, perhaps?:D

umm :eyebrow:

Attachment 45932

Now that's hot! It reminds me of this old gal I used to meet down behind the barn. The memories of my youth....

Dicks on, that is.

And then when they flush the fire hydrant...

Puts me in mind of some ol' girl who drank from the old sewage lagoon.

Have not verified butt' supposedly this is a TSA training "tool"

Attachment 45985

:D

Very fitting !

Boong-Ga Boong-Ga home edition.