LJ bitches about......
 

here are 10 reasons I'm starting to hate you(ode to my partner at work):

1... You enjoy observing hardship in people's lives and relish their failures. I don't care if a guy you worked with 7 years ago and hated got fired again. why does that make you happy, asshole?

2... Your hatred of 2 of the people we work with is consuming you, and you make poor decisions because it has tainted your judgment. I'm fucking sick of hearing you say "I just want to bash his fucking face in" 5 times a day.....because you don't have the fucking balls to do it, or even to say it to either one of them.

3. You whine like a bitch when you have a sniffle, and I don't care how terrible you feel today.

4. I'm fucking sick of all the sighing when you have to actually work hard to keep up.

5. I don't care if that girl in the showroom reminds you of someone that used to suck your cock. The main thing is that no one sucks your cock anymore except your wife, and that is OBVIOUSLY not good enough for you, and that's why you look at porn all fucking day long and constantly make references to it like some kind if twisted fucking sex addict that's not getting any sex. go jerk off in the bathroom and get your mind off of it ferrchrissakes.

6. every time i tell you a joke, you try like hell to NOT find it funny, and seem to resent it if it actually makes you laugh. you only laugh at the jokes YOU tell...and they suck because we've all heard them twice this year. from you.

7. You eat with your fucking mouth open. mack mack mack. get the fuck out of my office and go eat in yours you nasty fuck.

8. You're an asshole to the salesmen whenever you can be, so that every time they need a little help, they'll come to me and not bother you.

9. You just don't get it when someone invites every one in the dealership except you and a couple other assholes to her wedding.

10. I hate it when you tell the same shitty story about how much your kids love you to one person at a time 17 times within my earshot.

please die in a fire.

thank you.....there's more, but 10 is a nice number for a list.

When did you start working with my Boss?

Wow, someone really does have their cranky pants on today.

The first time i said it, it was a joke. Now I'm really starting to think it's a fact.

Hope things improve for you.

shut the fuck up!

I'm not the one doing all the bitching today...and I was trying to be nice.

i was being funny. now stfu more

Well, you'll have to bitch a lot more to get me to stfu. As you know I can be pretty persistent. :)

eta: Have a blessed day. :D

eta: The previous statement does not reflect my personal spiritual or religious beliefs. It was intended purely for shits and giggles. :)

:giggle:

Now where are the shits??? :eyebrow:

Now hit send.

I am sorry you have to deal with such a dick, LJ. :( I hate when other peoples' energy sucking gets in the way of an otherwise good day.

Oh I know.

LJ has them.

:lol:

I'd like to hear the other guy's story... he's probably lurking anyway.

I understand, Lj.

Life can be a shit sandwich at times - and you've had a nibble. Wash it all down with some blessed days and you'll feel better.

:D

now. go paddle your turquoise kayak listening to the Dead on your Shuffle or whatever it is you hippies do to make yourselves feel better. Or just look at jinxs' ass.

Wait, I thought they put in a net nanny thing at your office?

they left our offices off of it because it causes problems with the different types of migration we need to do.

this has been building for like 5 years. he was just off for a few days, and i didnt realize how much better i like it when he's not around. He's great at his job and makes us money and does the right thing most of the time..... he's just a horrible evil vindictive person and it wears on you when you have to listen to it all damn day. I notice it more because it's slow I guess. When it's busy, we're both cranking away and this kind of shit isn't as apparent.

I thought I would try tiki's thing and vent on here. It's nothing that other people I work with haven't said or heard said..... and to tell you the truth, it didn't make me feel much better.

Wait wait, let me tell you about control issues!

You forgot the "shriek at everyone" part.

that part's just not my bag, baby

Well, then don't come running to me if your methods aren't as effective as you'd like. Hmmmph.

although 10 posts in, ali had 5 posts.....i was tempted.....and bruce.....there IS no other side to the story....because there is no story. just my withering distaste

Oh, annoying people in the office...I get that. Here today we have, again, Hacky McCoughalot, and Ms Bangle Jingle Arms (sounds like a damn dog with tags running by every 3 seconds) and Guffaw McGee.

Still, not too bad...yours sounds really irritating!

At least you can hear ms bangles coming so you can avoid her if you want. :D

I'm trapped, like a rat in a maze of cubicles!

Well can you hide under the desk then. :D

We've just added "Ice Bitin' Bitch" and "Snorty Slurpy Slob."

Some days other people's noises drive me crazy.

Well it would have only been one post if you didn't tell me to fuck off or whatever it was you said. :)

You bring these problems on yourself you know. lol

Alas, the desk is bolted to the cube, and facing outward. I'm trapped, I tell you. TRAPPED. :lol:

Maybe you could hide under the invisibility cloak. Then you could spy on people and play trickses on them.

What I'd really like is a Cone of Silence!

....what, better than a Lasso of Truth??

I wonder if I could get all three?

wow ljs as a sensitive soul. It's ironic I know but I like that perpective.

now I feel so petty letting Vern Yip annoy me.

you do know that the LJ persona is one of spexxvet's sock puppets?

Let me guess, you'd force other people to stay in it so you couldn't hear them yammer?

Ohhh, now Im gonna be all paranoid. This is me on most days. :neutral:

The girls at work are too polite to say anything too.

I always like the sound of bangles and jingling jewelry. My boss Christine wore the most beautiful beads and bangles. Youcould hear her coming down the hallway *smiles* Was always a cheerful sound to my mind.

I thought lumberjim created "LJ" (and then fucked it up, lol) because he wanted "lumberjim" to stay on the verge of 10,000 posts, and L.J. was a sock puppet. But I have a lousy memory. ::shrug::

I do nothing by force, I just will it to happen, and eventually it does. I haz powers.

How about a traffic cone of silence? You just take one and shove it in their mouths and voila! Instant silence.

Beldar Conehead: When my people come to colonize this planet, you will be on the protected rolls, and no harm will come to you.
Gladys Johnson, Driving Student: You are wise. But there is a sadness to your wisdom.

Beldar Conehead: When the High Master hears of this he will surely cut off my plargh and hand it to me.

Your names for people make me think of Garbage Pail Kids. :lol:

All this time I thought is really was the real Jim.

It is the real Jim. I don't know what monster was on about in that post, but it's confused a lot of people.

heehee :p

So many sock puppets, so little time.

pikers

You bastard. :lol2:

Of course, silly me, you couldn't possibly annoy him... evah. :headshake

This place is full of elephants

eta...and paranoia

You'd have to be there to know how loved i am at work. i'm consistent, level headed, even tempered, friendly, helpful, and funny. I'm reliable, earnest, hardworking, detail oriented, intelligent, insightful, creative, persuasive, well dressed, well prepared, well rounded, and non ostentatious. i have soft hands, and am a great kisser. My turn ons include long walks on the beach, sitting by the fire, and ghost stories. my turn offs include mean people, arrogance, and cheesewhiz. my measurements are 19.5/ 56/42. I was Mr F&I july '05 and F&I guy of the year in '07. Sorry, ladies, I'm married.....happily.

:notworthy

. . .trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous . . .

So where's the calendar shot! You holdin' back?

I think he was holding his front in that calendar shot...

So the fact that you're a great kisser has what to do with work exactly? Are you always kissing ass or something? :D

Is the 19.5 your neck?

YARLY

:lol:

19.5 inch cock :lol:

that's DIAMETER people...think about it