Great Gift For Your Sweetie for Feb 14
 

Time to get your girl that special gift to let her know how much you care and help her think about you at the same time.

Skip the flowers this year fellas and get her something she will never expect:

A bronzed Lynx Penis-Bone necklace.

Hell yeah...you read that right.

Here is the article about it:

http://www.stltoday.com/lifestyles/f...7a4a78c22.html

And if a bronze animal dick on a chain is not your style...go for the bronzed mouse pelvis necklace instead.

Good Luck guys.

We really want whale penis.....

im getten MY Wife one of these

Awesome--the voiceover in the beginning is Mike Rowe.

oosik

I traded my wife's car in and got her a new one. That should be good enough. I will get her a card for V-Day.

I paid the water bill that just came. Happy VD, beest.

My wife and I both hated VD when we were single. Now we ignore it together.

But the pressure to celebrate it is so great, we usually need to make a pact each year that we won't even buy cards, otherwise we do.

My daughter calls it Single Awareness Day. I guess that is because she doesn't have a boyfriend.

No wonder, what with you methodically sharpening your hunting knives in the living room whenever they come over.

Gun Cleaning works well to Glatt

That was a joke dude. Wait til your girls start to date and then give me a call.... let me know how that works out for you and your wife.

OK, I read this as you joining the joke about STDs, but now I realise you weren't..... :lol:

I'm pretty sure glatt was joking too Merc. Put your defences down and read it as a bit of kidding about your views on gun ownership and hunting. ;)

(I do realise why you might sometimes take comments like that a bit personally though, and I'm sure plenty of others do too.)

That was a joke dude.

so was what HE Said

Hey Merc, I meant no offence. It was meant as a joke. Fathers joke about that kind of stuff.

Not Merc's type of father.... :p:

Everyone makes mistakes in interpretation of text from time to time. I don't think it's a good reason to criticize someone's parenting style.

Okay, people, from now on, EVERYTHING is a joke unless specified otherwise, okay?

J/K..

Hey, my bad... sorry about that. I was still reacting to being a little sensitive about one of the other threads that was dug up... Again. sorry about that.. No offense taken.

Cool, it's all good.

I was actually thinking about the father of this one woman I know. There were 7 kids in their family, and I'm pretty sure all 7 were girls. All were attractive blondes. The dad was a cop. He had a collection of old rifles that he kept on the wall in the living room. She had told us stories about him making the boyfriends wait in the living room with him and his gun collection while she was upstairs getting ready. I thought it was all a joke until we went to her wedding, and the reception was in the backyard of her parents' house. The living room was exactly as she described it. It was pretty funny, picturing this dad sitting with the boyfriends surrounded by all the guns.

I plan on sharpening knives.

I actually used a line like that on one of my daughters boyfriends who came to take her on a date and I said something like, "Make sure she gets home on time." with a pregnant handshake and he told my dau that I didn't intimidate him. I knew he was lying since he was a little skinny kid and I was a hell of a lot bigger than him. You really can get protective of your girls in this day and age, so much is different from what we experienced growing up. But at some point you have to cut the rope and let them go and hope it all turns out for the best. We have cut the rope with all of them and are officially empty nesters as of last Aug as our youngest Dau went off to college. An equally happy and sad moment. Generally it was time for her to go. I have always said if your kids did not want to leave home by the time they hit HS you didn't prepare them well for what is ahead. It is really hard in their teen years not trying to be their best friend, which is not your job as a parent IMHO. If they want to stay around the house after graduation they are not looking forward to life without you. It is hard and there are no rule books. Only what your gut tells you is right or wrong.

Oh, you fathers! You guys reminded me of this:

So, as teenagers, did a girlfriend's threatening dad ever stop any of you from doing dirty things to her? I'm guessing not.

Raising your children well is a partial substitute for not being with them 24x7.

My buddy reminded me of this the other day. He pointed out that his youngest was in a car accident, with five kids in the car. Four went to the hospital. His daughter was the only one with a seat belt on. She walked away.

Once. But only because I'd previously seen him totally stomp a guy's ass.

i was looking at a beautiful diamond necklace at the jewelers today, but i didn't buy it because i remembered i had no one to give it to....

also... the wonder boner looks totally awesome and if I totally know someone who needs one.

I like Valentine's day as the holiday i was brought up with, but that doesn't exist any more....

It was a day for sending an anonymous token of love to someone you fancied. They were supposed to be able to guess who it ewas and hopefully that would be the start of a beautiful new relationship...... and that was it. It's snowballed into Hallmark You-don't-really-love-your SO-unless-you-spend-a-fortune-on-them Day since then and it's much bigger/even more commercialized here than in the UK

funny...:D Just ordered myself a big box of fine chocolates since no one is gonna give me one. :lol:

me too. i ordered a day off. i doubt i'll get it though. sarge with diamonds, you with chocolate and me with free time. how about a chocolate covered diamond with free time!

I love free time! I'll take some of that and instead of chocolate I want a big pizza and instead of a diamond I want...more pizza.

I'm with Shaw on this one.
I want pizza until I can't eat any more pizza, then a side order of pizza.

AND the diamonds.

You can keep the chocs, and I already have too much free time.
See, I'm not all me-me-me.

Trying to thin of something cute I can bake for Valentine's day.
Haven't come up with anything viable.
Might just celebrate it inside my head.

I'll make something on Cellarity Day instead.

Sundae, if you make any kind of cupcake or muffin, but place a marble in between the muffin tin and the paper wrapper before it cooks, they will come out shaped like a heart.

Clod you are a genius.

What a great idea. I have some white cooking choc left over from the cake pops, so I will colour it pink and use it instead of icing. Oh and I have some strawberry flavouring, so little pink strawberry heart-shaped cakes!

We don't have marbles but we DO have baking beads, which will have the same effect.

I'm all excited now. I love the Cellar.

I know. I want to try this now. All I need is the ingredients, some marbles, a muffin tin, and some gumption. :blush:

And cow orkers you like enough to want to treat them...?

That is a great idea and a potential project for tomorrow afternoon!

Be careful with the strawberry flavouring if this is for kids with food-allergy issues -they often sneak the evil red dye in strawberry flavour. Sometimes you can buy clear-coloured strawberry flavour, which is usually fine.

It's not for the kids, it's for the staffroom. And it is clear, so fingers crossed. There might be evil red dye in the red colouring I'm for the icing though...?!

I assume none of the staff have allergies, as I've not been quizzed re the ingredients of my cakes before. But I have learned that the Deputy Head doesn't like sultanas and the TA in one of my previous classes doen't like honey. They all seem to like bananas though, the freaks.

Shaw - I'll post pics if you do..?
What am I saying, if they turn out well I'll post pics regardless.
And if not, I will post the sorry results anyway, in an attempt to make Clod feel rotten.

It wasn't my idea, it was just passed along recently in one of my messageboards (discussing home-baked treats that could rival the retail-decorated treats everyone else in the class would be having.) I actually have little silicone muffin cups that are already heart-shaped. :)

The red food dye these days is often fine because they use an alternative to the evil one. But the evil one is still snuck in in a few places where you don't think about it -I've heard you should be careful about marascino cherries, too. But adults should be fine, anyway. Have fun :)

SG another cool and easy/effective thing for cupcakes is cut shapes out of rice paper (in this case hearts), cut a slit in the top of the cake and insert the (edible) paper shape. people (kids especially) love that they're edible. We do this with ghost shapes in chocolate cupcakes at Halloween -at least we used to until we ran out of rice paper and bananalady couldn't find any more.......

I will try this. :D I still have a box of chocolate cake mix in the cupboard. Gotta make it before it gets old. And I will put red dye in the frosting! Haha...seriously, what makes red dye evil?

I love chocolate -- chocolate cake, chocolate ice cream, anything chocolate! As for the chocolate candy, I may eat just anything good, but I LOVE fine chocolates. I haven't eaten any fine chocolates for the last 3 years or so. So, I'm treating myself this year. :D And no, Whitman or Russel Stover isn't fine chocolate. I even snub Godiva although I'll eat it. :rolleyes: Yes, I'm a chocolate snob. Wonder what I bought? I got me-self a box of dark chocolates from La Maison du Chocolat. Yes, I splurged and I'm worth it. :D :lol:

Nah, I like to be able to eat my chocolates. Eating good chocolates makes me happy. :D

Baking beads added to fairy cakes do not equal hearts.
At least not typical Valentines hearts - perhaps mine are just anatomically correct.
Marbles needed.

I will take pics when I've iced them. Perhaps my edible pen will come in handy, delinating the shape that isn't really there.

FTR - I overcooked them anyway, so it's not like Clod is really responsible for a failed batch.

Sundae, someone else also reported that it didn't work if you overfilled the cups, they had to be no more than half-full of batter, or else they'd rise above the marble and just end up as cupcakes with a dent in the side.

Sundae, where are the pix? :D

MY CHOCOLATES ARE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!! :D:D:jig::D:D

Sorry for the huge pix. Too lazy to resize and besides, that's how much I loooooooove my chocolates. :D Btw, if I could go to the boutique, they would look and taste so much fresher. :love:

are there any left tulip? those loooook good!

A Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to show your beloved how much you love and adore him. Valentine’s Day is a day of romance, a day of "celebrating the two of you together". So, you would obviously like to give your boyfriend something unique and romantic, in order to win his heart. With a plethora of options around, choosing the perfect gift
can be a brainstorming process. However with careful thinking and planning, choosing the right gift is not that tough!

I like the ones that look like titties :)

Here are the cakes.
The dramatic lighting is just early morning sunshine in the staffroom.

They are gooooood! Yes, there are some left, but you can't have any. They're alll mine! Bwahahhhaha...:evil2:

Sundae: The sunlight effect is really pretty. I don't see any tittie cupcakes. :P

Are we sure this isn't a Chinese spammer in waiting?

Or a compulsive copywriter. I too am puzzled.