My visit to Derby
 

So my boss hands me his credit card and tells me to book my travel to Derby. The one in England. Rhymes with Terence Trent D'arby.

I feel like, as an adult, pulling this off seamlessly is somehow proof that I have my shit together. It isn't really. It's not an adventure. It's situation normal: in business, you fly to another continent, use different money and voltages. It's just part of what you might do for work.

These days you can get a passport quickly, from a big city Customs House. You need proof from your employer that you need to fly within two weeks. The letter saying so has to be on official letterhead. My employer faked a date within two weeks, and I was off to get a passport.

(So, appreciate this: you can get a passport fast, if you have a letterhead Word template. You should probably use a color printer to make it look more, like, real and expensive and stuff, but the clerk probably doesn't care.)

Then there had to be an official certifying of my birth by departments of whatever fuckin' records they keep on you in various county offices. It was actually important that the paper certificate had a raised seal, signifying that... someone had an embosser.

In this day and fuckin' age, we are still depending on pieces of paper. Now I'm not in favor of connecting all the IT systems of every government everywhere, but if they're going to employ someone to operate an embosser, surely they can employ someone to answer the phone, look up a record in a database, and tell the federales that Toad, first name Under, is not fibbing when he tells you although he had the misfortune of having been born, at least he got lucky and did so in the U S of goddamn A, which means he is a citizen, according to how they set things up here.

It turns out that you can't pay for your passport application with another person's credit card, even if it's the card of the employer who signed your letterhead document. So I had to pay cash. The price of a last-minute passport is $195. I had $200, all in twenties. They don't give out change, because of course that's simply not possible. Not possible. The Department of State can't operate cash drawers. What do you think they are, a retail operation?

So I paid $200. But after all that, the government checked my shit over and said it is OK for me to leave the country.

Suckers.

The big question is will they let you return? :eek:

I was lucky, after 9-11 the government required all defense contractors the verify all employees were wholesome good guys and not nogoodnik terrorists, by eyeballing an original birth certificate complete with embossed seal. Boeing said don't have one? Sign here, we'll get you one, eyeball it, and mail it to you. That made the passport thing much easier. Funny, I didn't need it for my first passport many years ago.

Be careful on your trip. There are some mighty strange folks in England. I think it is the in-breeding or something from being stuck on that itty-bitty island

Noted Al Q.

Had mine done at a post office somewhat recently. They wouldn't even let me pay with my own credit card. I was very lucky to have exactly $110 cash on me which was the fee to be sent to the passport office itself, and then they let me pay the post office fee (another $40) with my card. Also, I had to walk down the road to get my picture taken at Walgreens, because while the post office claimed to do photos, the woman told me it was "broken right now." I wish I could reproduce her face and tone to you now, but believe me when I tell you that it 100% said, "We both know I'm lying, and you can't do anything about it, bitch."

Passports are bullshit.

I agree 100%.

When you go to the website that discusses the fees, and read between the lines, they admit that the fees are outrageous, but they explain that the high fees cover not only the passport but also the emergency services a tiny minority of US travelers need when traveling abroad. Seems like those services provided by US embassies should be part of the State Department's budget.

Pshaw, the state department budget barely covers the alcohol and drugs. ;)

Our overlords don't want the poor people getting out of the country. Their money needs to be spent in-house, so it will trickle up. :cool:

Don't worry they exported the weirdos to the colonies.

:3eye:

;):D

Apparently, they're still doing it.:right:


:p:

burn

Trip is still a while out and I can feel my nerves going on edge. My main concern is getting the social niceties right. I have to remember everyone's name and what their function is. I'm still an introvert at heart and it takes concentration.

I have a list of what to pack. I'm on Amazon comparing laptop backpacks. They're all high-end now, with TSA-friendly parts that claim it's easy to go through security. Right. My goal is to get away with only carry-on luggage.

And then there are all kinds of logistics. Should I get money before going over, or is there a chance Heathrow has ATMs with decent exchange rates? Or can I just use my boss's credit card for everything? Can I pay by card for the Underground? I guess I need currency for tipping, buying gum, and bribes for officials and police. Anything else?

When I went to England on vacation 2 years ago, I don't recall using any cash. Everything was done by credit card. There must have been some cash used, but I can't picture a single transaction. We got oyster cards for the tube and paid with Visa. My Starbucks card even worked in a Starbucks there.

Call your credit card company before you go to let them know you will be traveling, so they don't flag your charges as fraudulent and freeze your card.

I haven't been back in a long while, but unlike the antiquated American system UK cards have chips in them, a lot of small retailers my not accept the card if it doesn't have a chip, should be OK for places more used to travellers like Hotels I would have thought.

Cash is king, accepted everywhere, but pickpockets are much more prevalent than in the US

Where are you flying to, the Underground is only London?

Derby is on a major rail route, it would be fairly easy to get a train from London to Derby, but you would need to get across London fromt he airport to the train station, the tube is good for that, then a cab from the station.

Can you ask someone form the local office what they recommend, their HR for instance ?

Thanks for the hints!

Yes, the plan right now is to go Underground from Heathrow to King's Cross/St Pancras and then get an East Midlands train from there. They told me not to book a train in advance because I don't know how long airline/customs delays might be. I'll just buy a ticket for the next train out.

I've actually taken that train out of that station, many times. But it was 37 years ago and I'm told things may have changed since then.

Time passages
There's something back here that you left behind
Oh time passages
Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight

I just remembered, I ordered a slice of pizza at the Camden Lock food court and paid with cash, so I did have some with me. I can't remember where I got it.

Looks like you can buy an Oyster card online and have it sent to you in the US before you go. Not sure how quick the turnaround is.

I can't speak for large hotel chains, but pubs and supermarkets only accept chip & pin cards now.
And small independents will not accept cards for purchases under £5 or even under £10 in some places.

Cash is king.
No idea what pickpocket rates are like in the US, but I've never been a victim in the UK myself. Not in London or the East Midlands. Although I admit I was taught to be wary from a very early age. For example it used to be a common trick to grab things from under the stall doors in public toilets. I've never lost the habit of hanging my bag on the hook inside the door, or if there isn't one, holding my bag on my lap. Nanny never put her bag on the floor anywhere, simply so she could have it on her lap without worrying where it had been. Dani admired my pink bag, which I am very happy with. It seals via popper, zip and button. Short of actual bag-snatching, no-one is getting my purse without me knowing.

I feel like I'm carrying coals to Newcastle by saying this but check the internet re the best advice about changing money. You're coming at a bad time for the pound, sadly. For you I mean, it's strong at the moment.

Last time I went abroad it was weak and it served me better to withdraw money from a local ATM than change it in the UK. It would have been better to use a card for transactions but research suggested many places only took cash or had a surcharge. *this was in Amsterdam)
There are plenty of placs to change money at Heathrow, I just can't say what will leave you better off.

Having a choice of cash or card will give you more options on the Underground if you want to get a ticket from a machine. There will be a single queue which takes in 3-8 machines depending on the station; some are Card Only, some Cash and Card, some No Change Given (gah!)
Your route across town is a fairly easy one, but I'll break it down for you if you like, just ask.
Oh - best to have cash of you want to eat or drink on the train.
Card machines have a bad habit of breaking down mid-journey and you don't want to be stuck somewhere outside Peterborough with no way of buying a cup of tea ;)

This is the motherload of information on using ticket machines in the tube.

http://oystercard.webege.com/index.htm

They will show you all the different types of machines you will encounter.

Re: train tickets. If you buy on the day it will be much more expensive. You can prepurchase tickets that aren't tied to a specific train - that might be your best option

you will get a crap exchange rate and fees at Heathrow. You only really need to tip a cab driver or a waiter and it ain't 15-20%. Unless you're staying in a super fancy hotel. In which case you would need a real suitcase. You can carry on a laptop bag in addition to your one piece of hand luggage by the way.

Clarification: not talking about the subway trip, but the train from London to Derby

take a gun, they're very effective over there for prompt service, especially if you sew a Canadian flag to your jacket to really scare them. :angel:

Apparently there is an express train from Heathrow to Paddington and I am a chump if I don't take it?

Who's paying? How much of a hurry are you in? How much comfort do you want? The Heathrow express takes about half an hour and is more comfortable. The tube (subway) takes about an hour and a half and costs considerably less.


Sent by thought transference

The company is paying. On with the comfort.

right on. Maybe just get a taxi the whole way :)

Britain is 5 hours ahead of me, time zone wise. Should I start sleeping "ahead" to try to avoid jet lag?

no.

just prepare to sleep most of the first day and you'll be good. Sleep on the train. How much of a regular sleep schedule do you keep anyway? travelling mucks up your tiredness levels anyway.

In my experience, YMMV

When I do my flights to other timezones (5 to 7 hours ahead of UK) I don't even try to sleep on the plane (which is an option). Depending on the landing time I'll either try to get about four hours' kip when I get there, or just bash on through the day and go to bed early. True, I do not have the expectation of any social activity while I'm away, but you could use tiredness as a way to get out of any Monday evening socialising, perhaps?

Interesting! I've wound up sleeping 15 hours on the second day in the past, which will not work in this circumstance.

Comfort: the business allows people to fly business class if the round trip is less than $5k.

Sadly: They told me too late to book my flight. You can't get a price under $5k this close to departure.

However: I still get economy "plus" which I think means I get an extra 5" of leg room and a refundable ticket.

:coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee::coffee:

My laptop backpack came and it is pretty excellent. It isn't the pack that zips all the way open for TSA. That costs $30 more, and this item isn't being paid for by the boss, so I figured I would just let any security examine my electronics in full.

I can't believe I never had one single backpack in my life before this. What a fine invention.

Surely you did have them in school, right?

No back in the 70s we didn't cotton to such newfangled ways and appliances and whatnot

In college some people did, but I never studied all that hard, so I would only carry two books around at most.

I didn't have a backpack (at least I think that's what we'd call a rucksack) until I was in my '20s. All my bags, and those of my contemporaries were over the shoulder ones, or sports bags for the boys.

My dad insisted on calling them "knapsacks" throughout my childhood. Then again, he also said Nazi as if it rhymed with patsy, so clearly he had a complicated relationship with the lexicon.

I never carried my books in any bag in HS. No matter how many books I was dragging along, I carried them.

Everyone had backpacks at my college, but it was terribly uncool to hook both sides around your shoulders. Backpacks had to be slung over one shoulder only. Oh, we were so asymmetrical in the 80s...maybe the one shoulder thing was to counteract the crooked hair or the multiple earrings in only one ear?

That's how it's supposed to be pronounced isn't it? Nah tsi

NOT-see. ;)

It is supposed to rhyme with "knot." It is not supposed to rhyme with "cat."

I say it like yahtzee

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/pron...ritish/nazi_1#


Then again the way you guys pronounce 'not' isn't so far away from that :P

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/pron...-english/knot#

Heeheee...I listened to the pronunciations. I say it more like the British example. The US one sounds really twangy, even to Midwest twang girl here. :)

I love listening to the different pronunciations :)

The name Craig always gets me when I hear Americans say it. It always sounds really odd to me. Over here it's pronounced Crayg whereas whenever I hear Americans say it, it sounds like Creg. Always sounds slightly cut off to me :P



Hahahahahahaahha. I just googled Craig pronunciation and there's like pages and pages on it :p

Oh, see...that drives me bonkers, when folks substitute the long a sound with a short e sound. (I'm not sure I'm describing this correctly...I dropped my phonetics class in college. HATED it!)

Oh yes, it's Crayg!

eta: At the liquor store yesterday (ahem, um, er...) I heard the cashier telling everyone and their dog where she gets her 'nells' done. Over and over. "Oh, I won't let anyone else do my nells. I like how blahblah does my nells. I get my nells done every 2 weeks." It was like fingernells on a chalkboard.

Hahahahahahaha. Yeah that's irritating.

The one that always gets me is the Northern UK pronunciation of "air" syllables (which I hear all the time because of Lee Mack on Would I Lie to You?)

The burr sat in a churr because his hurr kept blowing in the urr...

i lost my damn post!

I quite like that type of accent. Especially the more pronounced brogue kind like the accent of Bolton, Bury, or Rochdale.

Jane Horrocks comes from Rawtenstall, and that's like the classic Lancashire brogue.





In that accent the rs get pronounced almost like in American English - so the r at the end of car is pronounced.


Bolton has a couple of different accents, ranging from something quite similar to Lee Mack, to something closer to Horrocks

Peter Kay, a comedian from Bolton has the accent I mainly grew up around. Elements of this are in my speech, but it is a little less pronounced most of the time. His Phoenix Nights was set in Bolton, and the actors were mainly local. The white haired guy at the start was my mum's boss when she worked at Bolton Royal Infirmary, before he went off on his comedy career.

For Toad to help get acclimatised:)

more help

The hotel I'm going to stay at is right next to a cricket club. Derbyshire. If I get a good room it might overlook the pitch. My support counterpart says the team isn't so good. But that's not really the point...

You need to buy a derby hat while you are there

Americans should be advised that it's pronounced "Darby" and always has been.

Don't complain, we have so many screwed up place names pronunciations. Half of them came from Britain. But we have no excuse, for example, for the dually-pronounced "Houston" which is said one way in Houston, and another way in Manhattan. A moment of thought will tell you that "HYOO-stən" is a pretty ridiculous way to say it. "Hou" is "how" as in House.

I’m flying both ways on British Airways so I got the British Airways app on my phone. The app is just beautiful. Every time I open it, it tells me the details of my next flight. It tells me how long until check in, reminds me of what seat I’m in, and when the flight is. And it does it with awesome background images, of planes or of London. I wonder if I was flying to another city, will it change to that city? I guess I’ll find out.

British Airways also lets you select your seat. I picked the same seat on the same airplane, inbound and outbound. I had the advantage of knowing the seat layout of the plane because I looked it all up on Seatguru.

The whole check in thing. This is over now. The app lets me check in when the flight is 24 hours away. I don’t have to be at the airport or anything. At this time “check in” without bags means we are basically just promising to take the flight. “I am still planning to fly tomorrow.”

Yes, it's cool isn't it! I'm still a little antsy about e-check-in (where available) when I am in some of my weird and wonderful locations, but in the civilised world it is fab!

Against everyone's advice I am waking up earlier to try to partly combat jetlag in advance. All I know is, when I was in London on honeymoon, we were useless on day 2. We laid down to take a nap in the afternoon (no not in that way, we were sleeping, and anyway my ex was usually against sex of any kind, at least with me) and suddenly it was tomorrow.

If you can get outside in the sunlight those first days, do it.

We spent the entire first day out in the sun walking around, no naps, and went to bed at like 8:30 pm. Next day, we were a little tired, but had no trouble getting up at 6 or 7 am and staying up until 10pm. We were completely adjusted after that.

ymmv, since you'll be sitting inside in an office.