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-   -   Jea-lousy (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=11897)

Trilby 09-29-2006 02:38 PM

Jea-lousy
 
What do you think of people who tell you things to MAKE you jealous and then, when you're jealous, they say, "Oh, well. Try not to think about it..."-???

Like this: "Oh, here's a pic of me and this young woman who helps my mom out around the house. Mom tries to fix me up with her!" and you are his girlfriend? I mean, you THOUGHT you were his girlfriend? And he's done shite like this before? Do I overreact? Or, is he jerking me around?

mrnoodle 09-29-2006 03:00 PM

1) he's insecure
2) he's a dick
3) he's testing the waters for a 3-way



Take your pick. But it's probably not good. imo.

Flint 09-29-2006 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrnoodle
3) he's testing the waters for a 3-way

Quote:

Originally Posted by Peter "Family Guy" Griffin
"Jokingly at first, but then I was gonna gauge your reaction and if you were cool with it, we would go from there."


glatt 09-29-2006 03:09 PM

He's probably a little insecure with some amount of cluelessness thrown in. But comes off looking like a jerk. You should let him know you didn't appreciate it, but don't blow it up into a big thing.

Flint 09-29-2006 03:13 PM

Trying to puff up his desirability with the "competition" factor, IE touting his "other options" . . . ? (textbook insecurity)

Trilby 09-29-2006 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint
Trying to puff up his desirability with the "competition" factor, IE touting his "other options" . . . ?

See, I think that is a large part of it. He already KNOWS I adore him. Plus, I think he's being 30% insecure jerk. maybe 50% insecure jerk. My gut says so. but, like i said, I adore him! why does he DO this? what's that song...carly simon: Why'd you tell me this? Were you lookin for my reaction...that one.

Elspode 09-29-2006 03:33 PM

Is this the Gooey Nerd of Love, here? If so, the fact your yourself identify him as a nerd may have a lot to do with this. Nerds typically don't have much experience with dealing with women who aren't their mothers.

He could just be hopelessly, but attractively, inept.

DucksNuts 10-02-2006 08:15 PM

In my (limited) experience, some people use jealousy as a gauge of how much you care for them.

Havent you ever known a girl that uses every trick in the book to try and make her SO jealous, then gets all pissy when that person doesnt react at all?

Sounds like he's trying to convince you that he's alot more desirable than he thinks?? He doesnt get that you dont need convincing :)

footfootfoot 10-02-2006 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna
What do you think of people who tell you things to MAKE you jealous ...

I stopped dating them in high school.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna
... He already KNOWS I adore him...but, like i said, I adore him! why does he DO this?

WRONG QUESTION. Why do YOU do this?

(a little self esteem goes a long way)

morethanpretty 10-03-2006 12:03 AM

Hmmm this is a hard one for me, I accidently make my boyfriend jealous all the time. I have a lot of guy friends. Perhaps it was an accident for him too...
I mention guys who hit on me, and the different things my guys say to me, to my boyfriend and its not to make him jealous or show that I have other options...I'm just telling him about my day, life, ect. There is really no reason to get jealous anyway, you either trust him around the opposite sex and if you don't you drop him. BTW he knows that the most wonderful thing anyone has ever said to me, after his "I love you", was when my HS friend Kyle told me,"You look gorgeous when you cry" I had had a bad day and that cheered me up.

lizzi 10-19-2006 12:57 AM

Tell him to stop fooling around. You are his gf, he should not do that to you. Playing around with your feelings and all.

Rock Steady 10-19-2006 01:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by morethanpretty
Hmmm this is a hard one for me, I accidently make my boyfriend jealous all the time. I have a lot of guy friends. Perhaps it was an accident for him too...
I mention guys who hit on me, and the different things my guys say to me, to my boyfriend and its not to make him jealous or show that I have other options...I'm just telling him about my day, life, ect....

I have to disagree with you here, you can talk about these things differently. My wife and I have opposite-gender friends that we each go out with to events, lunch, etc. We can talk about it while skipping over details that would make the other uncomfortable, or presenting things in a non-threatening way.

Buddug 10-19-2006 01:41 AM

As usual , the mad American jargon chills my bones .

Brianna , I tend not to mix with servant girls who help around the house .

And therefore I would never have a photo of a servant girl in my hand .

Trilby 10-19-2006 06:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buddug
As usual , the mad American jargon chills my bones .

Brianna , I tend not to mix with servant girls who help around the house .

And therefore I would never have a photo of a servant girl in my hand .

Mr. Darcy!? Is that you!?

Stormieweather 10-19-2006 10:33 AM

You ladies need a boyfriend who gets a kick out of it when guys flirt with you :p . You also need to trust the person you are involved with, or you probably shouldn't be with them.

If I ever suspect that my boyfriend is being less than honest about his ladyfriends or that he is cheating, I will walk away. Someone like that is not worth my time and energy.

On the other hand, it does help a great deal to hear comments like, 'oh she doesn't hold a candle to YOU, my love' rather than 'man she's hawt, I could see myself doing the horizontal tango with her'. Remarks like the latter are intended to keep you off balance and insecure. I have no use for someone who plays with my emotions like that.

Stormie


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