Entertain us with your bizarre dream
 

Because, mine last night:

I was in this big expo center, and J was with me. And there were old friends of mine there that I'd see from time to time. And I don't know what the expo was, I had a sense that it was a big craft show like my mom would work at in my youth. It was really huge, it had three separate sections and stairs and such. There was a lot more meaning to it that I've forgotten.

And then I woke up -- and somehow I knew I had to go back to sleep because the dream wasn't "done". And I feel asleep again, and went right back to the same place in the dream.

And then I learned that I had to drive from the expo, to northern New Hampshire -- for some reason not the little town where my Grandfather used to live, but just beyond it; and get something, maybe a little unmarked package. And then I had to return the package to my Grampa's old house, and then drive home to Pennsylvania. And for some reason I had to get all this done in one day.

And there was skepticism that I could do that in time, but I knew if I really drove hard, I'd get it done. For some reason I thought we were in an expo center in Virginia. I knew I could drive that route in 24 hours if I didn't stop to sleep. But then I learned that we were actually in Georgia, near the border of Florida!

Still, I somehow knew that I had to try to get this done in one day. So I got in my car, and J got in with me, and I drove, not knowing exactly where we were going. I was worried that I would never be able to complete the task now; but just driving, knowing the only hope was to find I-95 or any highway going north. And then there was a highway, but it was not marked in any way; there were no signs at all. And I turned onto it, thinking at that moment that I maybe made a mistake, and was heading south; and as I kept driving, the complicated highway ramp turned into a huge, roller-coaster LOOP. As in, you go upside-down.

And the other drivers were taking it rather casually, like it was exciting but natural; and maybe people actually chose to take this road, because it turned into an exciting loop, instead of the non-loop road. Then I knew it would be OK, if I focused and keep the car on the road and just keep it going fast enough so it could make the loop. They wouldn't build it if it couldn't be driven! I made the loop, but I had a sense of relief that I found could take the non-loop highway back north.

Then I woke up.

I like the leap of faith you took at the end.

(around 1:07)

You really don't want inside this head. This is why I have a therapist. :)

Entertaining? Yes. Acidic? As well.

So then, I said to Henry Kissinger "Prof Chomsky raises a very good point, what is your response"? And Dr Kissinger said "why are you asking a zombie about our 1960s policy to Indonesia? Braaaaaaaaaains" And he started to screw the top of Chomsky's head off, while Brezinski was still droning on about Russia and the exceptional circumstances of the emergency and ate his brains, right in front of the audience

And then I woke up.

People no longer ask me what I dream. I cannot think why.

I dreamt that Johnny Depp, playing the part of the Devil, was my father and Salma Hayek was my mother. Selma, still gorgeous, had reached the age of 30 and therefore too old for the Devil's bride. So, Johnny killed Salma and while he's doing it I go outside and water some beautiful flowers; the water from the hose uncovers a lovely young woman sleeping just beneath the dirt- she has blue eyes and black hair. She awakens (it's creepy but I'm not afraid) and turns out to be the younger sister of Salma Hayek and will now become the devils new, younger bride. Her name is Camilla. I am upset that my father is so callous towards my mother as to kill her while she's still beautiful only because she is thirty, but I accept it and get to know
Camilla. Camilla and I go to an Arabian bazaar and buy really cool earrings - and Camilla's hair keeps changing. We are amazing together and a man gets upset with me, pulls me by the arm, because my veil (we had to put on veils to go to bazaar) isn't on right. Camilla saves me. Together we joke about stupid men who think they can rule us.

Weird, huh.

oh, yeah. It's my ersatz birthday today!!

Happy birthday, Brianna!

(modest) "well, shoot! Thanks!"

I only remember one portion of a dream I had last night. It stuck out at me so much that I took steps when I was a bit more conscious to remember it.

The only details I can remember are this: There was someone who looked like Gandhi, but was dressed in more modern clothing, something close to a suit, that was a bit colorful. I don't remember the exact words of what he said, but it went along the lines of "I don't buy into guilt or shame. I'm a Rosicrucian."

I have no idea why I would dream this.

because you're an ersatz Rosicrucian?

You should have called me. I live a few miles from I-95 and could have given you directions.

I always dream I killed someone out of uniform and I'm trying to cover it up. I wake up in a sweat.
I'm never sorry I killed, I'm just pissed because I will always worry about getting caught. I never remember exactly how I killed them. Sometimes I don't even know why.

And no matter what I dream, I ALWAYS CAN'T FIND MY FOKKIN CAR!

Dude, where's my car?

I had this one a while back. I never wrote it up. It keeps coming back to mind periodically.

The setting is the future. Or maybe now, but in an alternate universe. Most things you'd consider familiar. Almost everything is done by automatic computer processing. And anything that needs to be done is triggered by a code. These codes are scanned, sort of like bar codes. Really, the entire society is based on these bar code-ish things. It's all very efficient, because the encodings can handle massive amounts of information, but the production cost is very cheap since it's just paper.

I'm waiting in line to pay for a pair of shoes or something like that. The clerk does a double-take when she sees me hand her my code. She's struck by the ornate, retro styling of it. [It is at this point that I realize that I am, in fact, the inventor of this barcode system, and I have determined that it's much simpler to just live my life anonymously and not draw attention to myself.] I thank her but say it's nothing special, I just have a really old code machine.

After this, perhaps the next day, I am in class, learning how the bar codes work. I'm getting a degree in some other subject, and the barcode studies class is a required distribution course. Of course it's stupid to take it, but if I try to flaunt my superior knowledge of the system, I'll blow my cover. Besides, I always enjoy seeing how the professors interpret things in the system. It's not unusual for them to miss the subtleties I put in but turn around and completely overanalyze some trivial piece of it that I gave absolutely no thought to.

Last night I dreamt we dwellars were all naked in an exercise class doing crunches, and some people had their innards protruding from their arseholes like that pic Jim posts occasionally. i was thankful to wake up.

well, you asked....

i dont know what ersatz means...

ersatz

One entry found.



Main Entry:er·satz http://www.merriam-webster.com/images/audio.gif http://www.merriam-webster.com/images/audio.gifPronunciation: \ˈer-ˌsäts, -ˌzäts, er-ˈ; ˈər-ˌsats\ Function:adjective Etymology:German ersatz-, from Ersatz, noun, substituteDate:1875 : being a usually artificial and inferior substitute or imitation <ersatz turf> <ersatz intellectuals>
— ersatz noun

so is it your birfday ewr whut.

happy bday juszt in case