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-   -   Dear John... (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=22719)

Trilby 05-11-2010 03:40 PM

Dear John...
 
Would you write a Dear John/Johnette letter to someone you wanted to be DONE with or would you just let the relationship die a natural death- as that is the way it is anyway (as in: a dead relationship - a non-relationship - a relationship that is NO MORE) ?

Sometimes I feel compelled to "sum up" as it were - and to lend some offical finality to the thing - but then I wonder if I'm just fooling myself.

What would you do?

monster 05-11-2010 03:44 PM

depends if they kept bugging me once I was done.

Cloud 05-11-2010 04:39 PM

no. bad for your karma

xoxoxoBruce 05-11-2010 07:38 PM

Write it, but don't send it. Satisfies your need for closure, and doesn't stir up any... shit bad karma. ;)

Cloud 05-11-2010 07:45 PM

after thinking about this, I'm going to change my answer a bit.

If this is a situation where you have already discussed your feelings, the status of your non-relationship, etc., and the other person already knows and understands, then fine--you don't need to belabor the point.

But don't leave the person going, WTF? If they have no idea why you are not calling, then you need to be honest and make it clear what's going on.

Cicero 05-12-2010 12:37 AM

Verbal Break-Up. Dear John letters amount to what was wrong with them. It's good enough to break up, and not put all their perceived faults in writing.

I like the idea of writing it and never sending it, as you need closure, after the verbal "talk".

Or you could just let the relationship suffer a slooooooow and tedious.....death. (not advised)

I mean, what if you just didn't like him very much? Or you were incompatible in some insignificant but incredibly annoying way? No need to pass out the hand-out. Give a call, meet, whatever, and let it be known you aren't interested. Be honest. Maybe they feel the same.

xoxoxoBruce 05-12-2010 01:33 AM

By the way, are you really thinking of writing in hopes of rekindling his interest?:eyebrow:

Tulip 05-12-2010 02:48 AM

Write it in a blog....:D hehehe....I'm just joking around. Seriously, putting it down somewhere may help you get it off your chest. However, bad karma is never a good thing to mess with. :p:

Trilby 05-12-2010 07:05 AM

I like the 'write but don't send' idea. that will help me and spare him.

monster 05-12-2010 07:09 AM

send it to post secret

glatt 05-12-2010 07:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster (Post 655658)
send it to post secret

Oh, good one.

Spexxvet 05-12-2010 08:21 AM

If you're really done, you shouldn't do anything else. Writing something is a continuation, not an end.


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