Minor Bitches
 

Put your small potatoes health grievance here.

Sinus won't stop dripping, ears are bugging, getting run down.

Insincere apologizing for leaving the thread title the same way I first typed it, cuz provocative.

Tendonitis in my left arm flaring up, can't lift 10 pounds with it, Advil solves but I forget to take it.

I need a haircut.

Aaaaallll over my head. I've been toying with the idea of growing my hair longer, and it's working. It's an inch past my earlobes on the sides, easily touching my shirt collar in the back. When freshly washed, I look like the runner up in a Barry Gibb look-alike contest. With my bandana on, the edges curl upward like Sally Field's wimpletips.

Worse, my mustache is at that very aggravating stage, long enough to be in my mouth all the time, making eating and drinking a somewhat disgusting spectacle for my dinner companions; sorry Twil. I'm trying to grow it long enough to twirl. I want a handlebar mustache, a long one. I want to paint it green for the rollerderby regional finals. The tempera paint I use fixes my hair stronger than any hair gel or mustache wax. I'll get my curl on no problem. But keeping the parts just over my lip swept outward instead of downward is the frustrating part. It's much more Wilford Brimley and less Salvador Dali.

V - pics or it didn't happen.

At the risk of TMI - deciding what to do for long term birth control now that I've had a kid is making my head hurt. Stupid body all hell bent on procreating.

My counterpart went home sick and I'm buried. This in a month where I've already done 25 more deals than he has because he took off Saturday last week for yK, and has had all the cake shifts because the salesmen all hate him and avoid him.

Wahhh!

Bitch hit our car in the parking lot and got out, looked at it and drove away. Witness didn't get the tag.

Major Bitch!

Heartburn. Something's bugging me. What is the root cause?

Sent by thought transference

Oops, I missed the part that this was about health stuff.

My allergies have been bugging me for the past two weeks or so. I think it's leaf mold or something. And my skin is starting to get dry. Summer's over.

Got a small pain in my leg just below the knee for the last two weeks. I can only feel it once in a while, and I can't make it happen on purpose.

I assume this is the end.

Sorry, Man. It's been nice knowing you.

Any major dude with half a heart surely will tell you my friend
any minor bitch that bums your stone surely will scorch your groove again
when the demon is at your door
in the cellar it won't be there no more
any major dude will tell you...

Tennis elbow + forgetting to take alleve = pain
weird recurring crusty spot in my ear
broken toe still hurts and is still huge

Sounds like you have one foot in the grave.

I feel happy! I think I'll go for a walk!

(He'll be stone dead in a moment.)