[Ernestine]

Hair on end with fearful excitment, I read Lumberjim's thread promising creative writing classes, each post bringing me closer to the first thrilling assignment, thoughts dancing with fanciful dreams of latent talent blossoming toward the sunlight of fame and fortune with only a few grammatical pointers and an elaborate spell checker standing between myself and the Pulitzer Prize, while bookstores everywhere cleared their shelves of excessive Clancy and King drivel to make room for the stunning new voice of literature and Oprah scheduled a special two hour show.

My hopes are dashed! Crushed against the jagged rocks of despair, even as Ohio innertubes are shredded on the razor scales of the Mad River rapids and my morning of hope ends with the mundane sound of Dr. Phil's voice coming from the family room.