[BigV]

staceyv--sorry Easter was poor tip time for you.

Originally Posted by staceyv

One more thing, even though I am jaded, I really, truly do appreciate the nice people, the ones who are pleasant to me and treat me like a person. The REAL people, not pretentious or condescending or trying to impress their friends or whatever. I really, truly do have kind thoughts for these people and they are what keep me going. I'm not totally fucked up. For all the assholes who have chipped away at my niceness, there really are a few good people out there.

See, when I go out to dinner, that's all I'm looking for from the waitstaff. Let's all be adults here, and it's easy enough to be nice. And to tip.

Originally Posted by lookout123

stacy - 15% is a decent tip. 10% is on the cheap side. 20% and up is on the extravagant side. if you don't think you are getting paid enough, then go to a restaurant that charges more for their food. 15% of $50, is a hell of a lot more than 15% of $20.

Infinitely more wise than all my bullsh*t babbling.

But this other comment from someone else, man...thanks for the very entertaining excerpt from the aptly named bitterwaitress.com site. Hilarious.

Just so we're clear, I think the author of the excerpt is on very thin ice trying to justify tipping. More clarity, I used to live on tips and so I have empathy for you and her(?). But the rantings here don't explain why I should tip, they only let the bitterness out.

funny tho...

Here is a quote from a post on my other favorite forum, bitterwaitress.com:

people who say why should they tip? They are eating in a restaurant and are ENTITLED to service and they should not have to pay extra for it, they think.

Well, yeah, unless I can go into the kitchen and get the food myself, I expect to have the food delivered.

When you eat in a restaurant, you are paying for the food and the preparation.

Uh, and to have it brought to me from the kitchen, and advertising and rent and utilities and wages and profit... Actually, I pay my bill, and what the owner does with the money is out of my control. Talk to you boss about it, not me.

That is why restaurants pay their servers $2.13 an hour.

Not. My. Problem. Clearly the restaurant owners have a waaay better lobbying organization than the servers do to rate an exception to the minimum wage laws (which, themselves are a travesty).

Because the cost of your service is not tied into the food. If it were, your food would cost a whole lot more because the restaurant does not operate on a profit loss. They would not start paying all those people waiting tables and bussers real wages and keep the prices the same. See, their costs would go up, and to keep the same profit margin (yes, this is a business, not a soup kitchen) they would have to charge you more to cover those employees.

Blah, blah, blah...Hey. If I could go into McD's and get a meal and change from my $10 bill, how is it that, say, Red Robin's costs are so astronomically higher that they have to charge 8 times more for the same thing? Duh, it's a business not a charity, and you show signs of knowing it too. But you overlook the business' motivation to keep it's costs low, especially it's labor costs.

I know you don't want to believe it, but I promise you that restaurant owners and corporations would not give you this personal servant and eat the cost out of their own pockets because they like you.

News Flash! You're not my personal servant. Oh, and you work for the restaurant. Not me. My personal servant? Will you wash my car? Cut my meat? Seriously. And the owners do eat the cost out of pocket, but your pocket, honey. You sell yourself too cheap. The competition's fierce and almost certainly someone will be standing in line behind you, who's NOT working, ready to take your place, if it's not working out for you. Maybe 10 people. Probably 8 of them were born in a different country. Your beef is with managment, not customers.

A person waiting on you, who serves you while you sit on your behind and order around, is a PRIVELEGE. Not a right.

And having a job is a PRIVELEGE, not a right. Say, I have a question. Do you tip the shoe salesman? Mailman? Paramedic? Flight attendant? Barrista? Car Salesman? Realtor? Trash collector? Doctor? Cashier at McDonalds?

The person that does everything for you at a restaurant and kisses your ass and more, the person you expect the world from on a platter, that is a person just like you. He was not born for the purpose of serving you. His place in life is not at your feet. You are just not entitled to service.

I met this person once. They worked for the government and were perfectly content in that role. They knew they were not born to serve me, and they communicated that truth with deafening clarity. It would be a horrible mistake for someone with that worldview to try to make a living as a restaurant server. Only a masochist would try. Seriously, when I go out to eat, I don't want my ass kissed, I don't want the world on a platter. I want room to move my feet around under the table, thank you very much. Just bring the food from the kitchen on time, and check back occasionally to see if we want to buy anything else from the restaurant. Then bring the check.

Rich people pay their butlers and maids and personal assistants. The restaurant actually gives you the ability to not tip well for poor service, so that you get good service in the long run. It's for your own good, man. I mean, why else would anyone care if you got your 4th refill automatically? Or, that we remember you told us an hour ago it was your wife's birthday.

Be a butler, be a maid. Personal servant, my eye. Look, I know what I am getting into when I go out to dinner. If I wanted to get my own food and my own beverages, I would. Indeed, I often do. Plenty of restaurants are discovering that it's cheaper to charge for the cup and give away the pop rather than keep an expensive inefficient server on hand that costs money for the whole shift and rarely brings in any profit. But we probably move in different dining circles.

If I wasn't hoping for 20%, I wouldn't have such a good memory. Really. My memory is sh*t. When I started waiting tables, I forgot half of what I needed to remember. But, I want 20% .. so I forced myself to remember all kinds of things that really are not that important to me.... the only real importance they have for me is that I want your dinero. If I didn't get a tip, well believe me, I would not have worked so hard to develop such a good memory. I certainly wouldn't suck at my job enough to get fired, but I sure as hell wouldn't work as hard as I do. I really would let you wait a whole lot longer for things, instead of learning how to do 5 things at once for 5 tables so you hardly wait at all for something. And, really, the fact that you think of me as your personal slave for an hour..... that doesn't come free.

I detect a severe case of cart-horse transposition. You have sow before you reap. And I studied hard in school to get good grades, so my customers wouldn't have to wait long for answers to questions. Should I become dumber or act dumber if I don't get the strokes I want? That's so self-destructive. Sheesh. Go have your bad hair day in some other poor sap's section, and I'll get my own iced tea. I can see it sitting there at the end of the freakin bar anyway.

Do the right thing, I know it's hard in this day and age. I know you are a selfish person and don't think of anything but you. I know you want everything for free. I know you think the world revolves around you. But, it's not the right way to be.

Look, I'll do the right thing and stay the hell away from your restaurant. You do the right thing and get a job as a lineman for the county or parking enforcement officer or President of the United States where your contact with the public is highly controlled and you're in a position of power to disregard them entirely or to drown them in your righteous bitterness. Then the facts still won't matter, but at least you'll be getting paid.