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No offense to your wife, but this is very teacher-ly. I have a lot of teachers in my family and they will quickly devolve into treating everyone like gradeschoolers if they're not careful. It's always especially bad right at the beginning of the schoolyear. I think the instructive nature of the note is unintentional, and is only a result of the stress she's under this month. I would definitely mention how it made you feel, but be prepared to cut her some slack for it too.
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