The Cellar - View Single Post - Do guys really care about a girls sexual history?

samothy · 10-15-2006, 06:04 AM

Most guys I've been serious with have tended to take almost zero interest in my past affiliations with other males--I've always been the one to volunteer information first. I'm speaking from the perspective of someone who has been serially involved with people who've had next to zero sexual history, and having come from a background of silence about sex: I'd be more inclined to put greater faith in a relationship where both parties came with some experience at least under their belts... But that might be too simplistic

Beyond the basic questions of 'how much of a physical health risk am I taking by sleeping with you?' I'd be more concerned with what they feel they've learnt from previous partners rather than simply condemning/praising/whatever for the sheer number value of previous partners.

Sex can be as complex a phenomenon, or as simple as you want it to be--One boy I know (who, as a previous poster mentioned, may well suffer from poor self-esteem) who's been promiscuous in years past is now bending over backwards trying to preserve his first emotionally significant relationship. Other friends have spoken of how they're in favour of open relationships because sex is mainly physical and fun and they feel secure in their emotional attachments to their partners to allow for said flexibility. On the other hand, we're all relatively young and haven't been forced to accept 'adult' life quite yet. I'm in favour of faithfulness within relationships, and especially within marriage, if for no other reason than it reduces emotional dramas >_<

Boils down to having compatible world/life viewpoints, I suppose. If your ideas of what love and intimacy mean to you are inextricably linked with the properties of exclusivity within your relationships, then it'd obviously be easier on the mind and soul to be with someone who feels the same way. I tend to play in a grey area where I and my partner/s are concerned here--still trying to work it out for myself

Oh, and /agree with previous posters who've pointed out the futility of trying to generalize in this area.

10-15-2006, 06:04 AM	#227
samothy and afterward many are strong in the broken places Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 3	Most guys I've been serious with have tended to take almost zero interest in my past affiliations with other males--I've always been the one to volunteer information first. I'm speaking from the perspective of someone who has been serially involved with people who've had next to zero sexual history, and having come from a background of silence about sex: I'd be more inclined to put greater faith in a relationship where both parties came with some experience at least under their belts... But that might be too simplistic Beyond the basic questions of 'how much of a physical health risk am I taking by sleeping with you?' I'd be more concerned with what they feel they've learnt from previous partners rather than simply condemning/praising/whatever for the sheer number value of previous partners. Sex can be as complex a phenomenon, or as simple as you want it to be--One boy I know (who, as a previous poster mentioned, may well suffer from poor self-esteem) who's been promiscuous in years past is now bending over backwards trying to preserve his first emotionally significant relationship. Other friends have spoken of how they're in favour of open relationships because sex is mainly physical and fun and they feel secure in their emotional attachments to their partners to allow for said flexibility. On the other hand, we're all relatively young and haven't been forced to accept 'adult' life quite yet. I'm in favour of faithfulness within relationships, and especially within marriage, if for no other reason than it reduces emotional dramas >_< Boils down to having compatible world/life viewpoints, I suppose. If your ideas of what love and intimacy mean to you are inextricably linked with the properties of exclusivity within your relationships, then it'd obviously be easier on the mind and soul to be with someone who feels the same way. I tend to play in a grey area where I and my partner/s are concerned here--still trying to work it out for myself Oh, and /agree with previous posters who've pointed out the futility of trying to generalize in this area. __________________ lauft, lauft um euer Leben!