The Cellar - View Single Post

kerosene · 12-30-2006, 07:05 PM

^ Bruce is right ^

But I don't think it has to be viewed as cheating, as long as you are completely open and communicative to both about your intentions. It sounds like you are. Perhaps your partner needs a little time to adjust, through which you will need the big can-o-patience. And by open and communicative, I don't mean necessarily a play by play to ease the fears of your mate. I just mean that if you act as if you have nothing to hide, represent that you will talk about anything if asked, then I think the questions will come, followed by understanding.

I don't think you ought to dump one guy or the other...it doesn't sound like you have the same kind of relationship with the Canadian guy. If you dump your platonic friend, you might later resent the decision and feel that your SO is somewhat to blame, causing problems in the relationship that are somewhat tougher to cope with, IMO. If you dump your SO, you may be missing out on what that relationship could develop into, assuming you get past this and learn from it as a couple.

12-30-2006, 07:05 PM	#19
kerosene Touring the facilities Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The plains of Colorado Posts: 3,476	^ Bruce is right ^ But I don't think it has to be viewed as cheating, as long as you are completely open and communicative to both about your intentions. It sounds like you are. Perhaps your partner needs a little time to adjust, through which you will need the big can-o-patience. And by open and communicative, I don't mean necessarily a play by play to ease the fears of your mate. I just mean that if you act as if you have nothing to hide, represent that you will talk about anything if asked, then I think the questions will come, followed by understanding. I don't think you ought to dump one guy or the other...it doesn't sound like you have the same kind of relationship with the Canadian guy. If you dump your platonic friend, you might later resent the decision and feel that your SO is somewhat to blame, causing problems in the relationship that are somewhat tougher to cope with, IMO. If you dump your SO, you may be missing out on what that relationship could develop into, assuming you get past this and learn from it as a couple.