[Cyclefrance]

With Sunday predicted to be (and actually was) a total washout (rain-wise), the cycle-ride I had planned to do with my pal from north-east of London was moved to saturday afternoon. Nothing to heavy, just a modest 46 miles in a shade over 3 hours, and enough to render me 'unsuitable for purpose' thereafter.

The work which should have been done on Saturday (course re-write which needed to be with the client by Monday - an intensive PowerPoint affair) was thus postponed until Sunday. I had the place to myself anyway as Mrs CF had popped over to Spain with two friends for a week's relaxation (post-hsyterectomy recouperation has been proving frustrating), so no sweat.

Except for that phone call that woke me from my blissful slumber at 02:15 Sunday morning. The mobile was going, and it was wife's ringtone. Now the last time she had called from Espana at such an hour (it was 03:15 there) whilst away with a friend, she had just written off their hire car! So, instantly awake, I jumped out of bed and grabbed the phone. I answered the call, but the line was dead. Not exactly what I wanted. But then the house phone rang. That was in another room. So I rushed to get it, picked it up, and.... dead again. Now I was getting just a little panicky... and the adrenalin was having its usual effect on my internal organs...

I called her mobile - had someone stolen her phone, I thought. Or perhaps it was another car incident. A few rings and Mrs CF answered. 'What is it? are you all right?'

'No.' came the reply. 'We're stuck outside our B&B and can't get the gate to open with the key. Do you think you could look up their number and call them as we don't seem to be able to wake them up, and we're not sure how we are going to get in otherwise.'

Now, don't get me wrong, but I wasn't exactly sympathetic about the reason for being called. Phone me at 3.00am local time, some 2000 miles away, to find a way through a difficult gate?

I chose the easiest option under the circumstances - I found the number and after about 20 times dialling it (it tripped to voicemail after 4 rings so that meant disconnecting and redialling to keep the ring going), I had success. Not that the B&B owner was too excited about the situation either...

Job over, bowels required opening (I know, not a nice image, but I'm trying to be truthful - that's what adrenalin does for you), and I found it almost impossible to get back to sleep afterwards.

Sunday, matchsticks at the ready, I groped my way through the re-write - took ages, hard to stop nodding off. A couple of catnaps gave temporary respite. Mrs CF rang. I don't think I came across very well. The phone went down a bit quick. She couldn't see my side of it really.

Suppose I'll sort it out on Wednesday when she returns (barring any further early hours phone calls from her in the interim... there's still a car that can be written off, handbag that can be stolen containing passports, money, air tickets, driving licence, keys and so on, and a catastrophe with the plumbing that floods the guest-house to possibly endure - I only say this because these things have all actually happened to her before... oh, and , of course, there was that missed flight - damn nuisance these ones that are timed just after midnight - she thought she still had 24 hours left in the place and so didn't go to the airport the night she should have - unfortunately I did, to meet her at the 2.00 am time the flight arrived - make that 3.00 am by the time everyone had come through the exit and I found out for certain that she wasn't on the plane...)