Deuce - you are NOT ALONE - there are many here who have gone through what you are now dealing with. I am just one of at least several that I know of. It is much harder to deal with because we are men and the system was specifically designed to protect and favor women. It sux, but its true. Nevertheless, you can overcome it. You have the strength within you - I know it - it is a fact.
There are many here who care and will offer their valuable insight and experience to you -
DO NOT leave this tool in the box either - USE IT.
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