Just watched it, so my feelings are raw.
spoiler alert
Way too long for the story it told, with a gigantic clusterfuck where the plot should have been.
Disjointed. Disappointing.
More of the same stuff - not that the stuff wasn't entertaining enough (it was great in the first and second movies), but there was such potential for this one to stand out from the other two the way the other two stood out from each other, what with
THE FUCKING GODDESS OF THE OCEAN
there to mess with things...which you totally fucking expected her to...but no, she turned into a bunch of crabs and became a whirlpool, and that was that.
Could have been a whole slew of new, fresh stuff to throw at the audience's heads - deities, monsters, merpeople, voodoo, Pacific Island folklore, Bermuda fucking Triangle - but pfft. Nope.
"This worked before, it'll work again, but this time we'll have Asian people. Kick ass!"
Also, what was with the Council of the Brethren or whatever?
I thought it was based on
Pirates of the Caribbean, not
It's A Small World, which it apparently is, because it is quite possible to travel from Singapore to Antarctica to Singapore, then around the horn of South Afuckingmerica and up to the Caribbean, all without gaining a day's worth of stubble - and it is cut to seem as if were a half-day's ride.
Calypso could have just led them to the Bermuda Triangle for fast travel - hell, they could have used
that to go to Davy Jones' Locker, and not had to worry about Singapore at all. Could have saved tons of budget, and made the whole story way more cohesive.
And come ON. Merpeople. Bad ass sirens doing Calypso's bidding.
Fuck the whirlpool, bring in the army of the oceans, held at bay until Calipso was set free. Lets see the East India Trading Company beat that.
SOMETHING other than "the second movie, but with more explosions."
And God forbid any of the characters
EVOLVE.
*I'm sure I'm being way too critical, but whatever. I'm extremely disappointed.
They could have done much better is all I'm saying. MUCH better.
The outnumbered good points were vastly overshadowed by the mind-numbing monotony.