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There is actually a book called "Understanding Exposure"! It comes highly recommended. (I admit I've never gotten around to reading it in depth.)
You're simply dealing with the amount of light entering the camera. One "stop" represents either double or halving (depending on which was you go) the amount of light coming in. So f/16 lets in twice as much light as f/22. (Why 16 and 22? I dunno. It's probably some math thing about inverse square laws but I don't really know.)
As you say, you can manipulate the camera (aperture and shutter speed) to control the amount of light, or you can add artificial lights such as a flash. strobist.com is a great site for info about combining off-camera flashes with existing light.
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