[Treasenuak]

Before I say anything else, let me first say thank you all for your concern. I appreciate that you are looking out for me, even though you don't know me from Adam outside the Cellar.

Now, I would like to address these concerns. First, Sundae Girl, because you raise some very valid points concerning my daughter being present. The drinking thing... yes. I do drink a little in the mornings if I'm not working. HOWEVER... and this is a big one... I do NOT have more than the equivalent of one beer if I am the only adult in the house with my daughter. Anything more than that happens only after she is asleep, or if Ted is present to watch her for me. The engagement to Mick... I will freely admit that was a VERY bad call on my part, and my only excuse is that it was a rebound reaction, something I KNOW better than to do. Regardless, that relationship has slowed WAY down, and honestly pretty much stopped. Next, Ted himself. Yes, he is a bit older than me. Yes, I'm living with him. No, sex did not start out casual, nor is it casual now. Do I ENJOY casual sex with older men? Yes. However, Ted and I do not have a casual relationship. I slept on the couch for a LONG time after I moved here, and I have my own cabin, my own bedroom, and my own bed, to which my daughter and I retire more frequently than I do to his bed. Finally, the BDSM lifestyle is not one that I am pursuing right now; this thread was started with the intent of information gathering and learning, nothing more. Does this help at all?

Now, Undertoad. I like you too, and I highly respect your opinion. And yes, I am in counseling already. And yes, the "dangerous sex-lovers" are into condom use. STRONGLY. Knife-play, in the hands of a trained Master, is not dangerous; the cuts inflicted are nothing more than one might receive from a paper-cut, and are treated immediately following play, with antibiotic ointments and bandages. Safe, sane, consensual is the rule with ANY BDSM play, and it is strictly adhered to, one might even say religiously adhered to. This is not me randomly walking up to someone and saying, "Slice and dice me". This is a carefully thought-out lifestyle choice for me. The "dangerous" play and pain is NOT what the lifestyle is about; that's the icing on the cake. It is the choice to submit one's will to another, to give control to someone who has EARNED it, not to any tom, dick, or harry on the streets. My Sir EARNED my respect and trust, and my submission, over a long period of time. People I have known for years vouched for him before I would even speak to him. I entered the relationship I had with my Sir very cautiously and with every intent at bolting at the first sign of threat... and it never happened. Sir never made a move until I was sure of Him and of what I wanted. So yes; from the outside this can seem like a stupid and dangerous way to live. But for me, from the inside and knowing how this decision was made and what it took to get to this point, I would not have it any other way.