[lumberjim]

A man escaped from prison where he has been
for 15 years. He broke into a house to look for money and
guns and found a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out
of the bed and ties him to a chair while tying the girl to
the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets
up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers
to his wife, 'Listen, this guy's an escaped convict
- look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in
jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he
kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist,
don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him
no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably
very dangerous... If he gets angry, he'll kill us.
Be strong, honey. I love you.

To which the wife responds, 'He
wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He
told me he was gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we
had any Vaseline.
I told him it was in the bathroom.
Be strong, honey. I love you, too