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I'm going to be all generous and wish for new boots for Sarge.
Hang on, isn't this an episode of Little House on the Prarie? Or was it Little Women.
Anyway, magic turkey grants me another wish because it's altruistic.
I'll have my stomach stapled please.
My new BF will buy me new boobs then.
(Please note, new BF is as fictional - and likely - as the magic wishing turkey)
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Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac
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