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anonymous · 07-11-2011, 07:07 AM

A friend told me this weekend that she has breast cancer. Not diagnosed, she hasn't been to a doctor in a very long time. Prior to this, the only people who knew were her and her husband. She hasn't told her 30-something kids, who adore her. She says she doesn't want to seek treatment: she's watched a couple people go through it and be sick all the time and die anyway, she says. I don't know if she's scared, or if no treatment is just how she feels about it.

But she showed me why she thinks she has it. Her nipple is inverted and her breast looks all twisty and she has a huge lump. She says "it's too late" but I don't know that's true. Once those signs are there, visible, frightening...has it progressed far at that point?

I don't know what to do. Keep bugging her to at least find out...if she then chooses no treatment it will be a choice not made out of fear. Should I tell her daughter (who is studying nursing) who I know would drag her to a doctor (this really isn't my place, I know.) I feel helpless that I can do anything to help her. I will be here for her no matter what she decides, but I want her to decide to fight.

She's a good person, good kids, loving family...she loves her dogs and her grandchildren. She's mid 50s. Too soon to leave us.

Thanks for the ears. I don't know if any advice exists, but if any comes to mind, I'm listening.

07-11-2011, 07:07 AM	#6957
anonymous Operations Operative Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: in hiding Posts: 578	A friend told me this weekend that she has breast cancer. Not diagnosed, she hasn't been to a doctor in a very long time. Prior to this, the only people who knew were her and her husband. She hasn't told her 30-something kids, who adore her. She says she doesn't want to seek treatment: she's watched a couple people go through it and be sick all the time and die anyway, she says. I don't know if she's scared, or if no treatment is just how she feels about it. But she showed me why she thinks she has it. Her nipple is inverted and her breast looks all twisty and she has a huge lump. She says "it's too late" but I don't know that's true. Once those signs are there, visible, frightening...has it progressed far at that point? I don't know what to do. Keep bugging her to at least find out...if she then chooses no treatment it will be a choice not made out of fear. Should I tell her daughter (who is studying nursing) who I know would drag her to a doctor (this really isn't my place, I know.) I feel helpless that I can do anything to help her. I will be here for her no matter what she decides, but I want her to decide to fight. She's a good person, good kids, loving family...she loves her dogs and her grandchildren. She's mid 50s. Too soon to leave us. Thanks for the ears. I don't know if any advice exists, but if any comes to mind, I'm listening.