[BigV]

Talk to her.

It's true that bringing up difficult subjects is a common way for uncomfortable conversations to begin. That's kind of the point. I'm not urging you to start a fight of course. Think of it this way. We heal from the inside out. If you get a cut, the flesh knits together from the bottom first and grows toward the surface. When it gets to the top, it's strong under the scar, but whole again. If that's not how it heals, if it skins over the top before all the crap is gone from the deeper parts of the wound, there will always be an irritant inside. That might just be uncomfortable, but it might cause bigger problems. It could develop into an abscess. It could look ok on the surface, but filled with infection, causing trouble for your whole body.

It's just an analogy. But our spiritual, emotional, mental selves are made of similar substance and subject to similar forces. You have to use your judgment, which is good. You have to use your words, which are many. You have to use your compassion, which is abundant. You have to use your strength and your courage, which are well documented and steadfast. You have to use your trust that they'll be grown ups, which might be a toss up, but you are responsible only for giving them the chance to understand. Just for giving them, and you, a chance for understanding.

Get it out. Even if you don't succeed the first time, you've made a beginning, try again, get the rest of the misunderstanding that is irritating your mind out of your mind. You may succeed, but only if you try. You may fail, but you will have done your best, instead of worrying and wishing.