[henry quirk]

"But it isn't really that simple."

Yes it is.

Culture doesn't alter reality. The transgender man (pre-op or after) is still 'male'.

Till nanotech advances to the point where tiny lil robots can zip into each cell and jigger 'round with DNA, no amount of cultural defining, surgery, or hormone shots alters the fact that male is male and female is female.

It is what it is...he is what he is.

*shrug*

#

"why not accept someone else's self-definition?"

Speaking only for me: 'cause reality trumps my (or his) definitions.

If he wants to self-identify as 'girl' -- again -- that's fine...no profit for or cost to me if he self-defines as 'girl'.

But the cost to me is high if 'I' pretend he's a 'she', 'cause he's not.