I loved her so much.
My last PM from her was re her birthday card:
Quote:
thanks
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for the card----it made me smile.
I am still in mourning. I feel like my soulmate has died.
I know it sounds stupid----but I am alone here and I'm not doing too well.
again, you are a gem of a friend, cherry.
xo-c-
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I didn't reply.
But I did speak to her last Friday.
She called on Thursday - when I was in London with Mum - and talked to Dad. He said they had a lovely chat. Which must have been mostly Bri, Dad being a bit deaf and confused by accents - although she had a lovely speaking voice.
I called her back Friday and she told me she'd had to give her new puppy back. She cried, but we were able to laugh. She said she was so proud of me for losing weight and we talked seriously about the problems both of us have with alcohol. She was always my confidant and cheerleader.
She was the best friend I never met.
We had so much we'd dreamed of, what we planned to do.
I cannot take in that she is dead. I can't comprehend that I will never be able to PM her about victories and failures again. That I will never be able to call her and chat for as long as a free call lasts. That Mum will never come up the stairs mouthing ("American?")
That I will never meet her.
I can't take it in, but I know there is a lot of grieving and crying to come.