Trying to outsmart a squirrel

chrisinhouston · 12-01-2006, 12:14 PM

Last night when the Mrs and I turned in we heard something in the crawlspace part of the roof over our bedroom. It went on for an hour or so before the visitor decided to turn in for the night. We agreed it must be a squirell that had found a way into the attic. As I fly back to Atlant on Saturday, my wife left with explicit instructions to do something about it.

So I spent an hour or so inspecting the overhangs of our roof and finally found a neatly carved entry point right under the soffit overhang. How the little bastard was able to hang on upside down and eat through the 1/2 inch plywood soffit I'll never figure out.

So I put up the extension ladder and took a scrap of wood, the cordless drill and some drywall screws and plugged the hole. I mean, afterall it's a beautiful day here after a crappy one so most squirells with any sense are out feeding or playing or sunning themselves, right?

I got on the computer and after awhile I here him in the attic above my office, so I go and get my pellet gun. This isn't any average Daisy Red Rider, it's a fancy ass German marksman model that shoots those lead pellets and has the stopping power just shy of a 22! I open the attic door and THERE HE IS! But I couldn't get the gun shouldered before he disappeared behind the furnace. I just spent close to 10 grand on a new AC and furnace system so shooting from the hi[ in the general direction of my new furnace was not an option

So I went outside and up the ladder and removed the patch, now that I knew he was in there I realized without an escape route he be in there for good. Then I got the pellet gun and doned my camo hunting jacket (nice and warm as well as good cover). I picked a spot in the garden out in front of my house and sat down. Now at this point I have no idea if he slipped out while I was grabbing my gear inside but decided it was worth a wait.

About an hour went by and I was reminded of how much we miss when we aren't paying attention and in a hurry outside or just inside the house. Several squirells bounced from tree to tree but I don't think either was the one in the attic, too big. I pondered what were the odds that he was still in the attic waiting for enough time to pass to escape. Some large vultures flew overhead, a male cardinal chased a female.

No luck, I think I'll try again later this afternoon. This is kind of a fun way to waste my day! :p

Oh and we definately have grey squirells here in Houston!

Shawnee123 · 12-01-2006, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chrisinhouston

No luck, I think I'll try again later this afternoon. This is kind of a fun way to waste my day! :p

Oh and we definately have grey squirells here in Houston!

LOL, why am I having images of Carl Spackler?

Elspode · 12-01-2006, 01:01 PM

Dude...bad news. If you've got a bunch of squirrels, even if you knock out the I'm Alright rodent, another will just occupy his niche. That's ecology for ya.

chrisinhouston · 12-01-2006, 04:19 PM

Well, I think I may have won round one.

Upon returning from lunch with my wife I saw the smallish squirell sitting on the edge of the roof as we entered the driveway, luckily he sprinted over the roof rather then ducking back into the attic.

I proceeded to don my camo parka (brown wetland grass patern), grab my gun and find a comfy spot leaning against a big pine tree. I figured I'd wait and see if either the creature returns or another one emerges.

I waited peacefully for an hour and watched countless squirells chasing each other from tree to tree and even had a few come with in 20 feet, but as I could not 100% ID the culprit I let them go; I'm not completely morally bankrupt.

After an hour and my leg going to sleep, I climbed the ladder in hopes that the attic is empty and attached 2 scraps of English Walnut (left over from an old attempt at furniture repair). At least the walnut should be harder then the ceder siding or the plywood.

chrisinhouston · 12-10-2006, 09:55 AM

My wife phoned me yesterday (I'm back at my parent's house in Atlanta) to report she heard squirrels in the attic again. I told her to go look where I had boarded up the whole near the roof. She reported that they have made a new hole through the wood and that while watching she saw 4 squirrels come out of the hole.

I think we have some kind of mutant part beaver squirrels!

xoxoxoBruce · 12-10-2006, 10:48 AM

Well, they chew through nuts....a board is a minor inconvenience.

lumberjim · 12-10-2006, 11:09 AM

steel wool.

or treat the wood with poison.

or...wait until they're in there, attach a trap to the outside, then scare them into it from inside.

also, jinx says......just shoot one, and put it's head on a spike near the hole as a warning.

Gravdigr · 04-22-2011, 02:58 AM

Momdigr was all: "How in the world did he know to take the top off? This is just amazing!"

Popdigr explained that's the only place the squirrel could smell the sunflower seeds that were inside, so that's where he chewed.

GunMaster357 · 04-22-2011, 07:38 AM

Some seeds with poison in the attic, maybe?

And, yes, I'm morally corrupted.

In case you've got children be very careful if you choose to employ this method.

wolf · 04-22-2011, 10:37 AM

Any attempt to outsmart squirrels is doomed to failure.

I'm tellin' yah, they're going to survive The Big One along with the roaches.

ZenGum · 04-22-2011, 09:53 PM

Outsmart squirrels?

You're nuts!

HungLikeJesus · 04-24-2011, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum

Outsmart squirrels?

You're nuts!

Especially squirell nutkin.

zippyt · 04-22-2011, 10:05 PM

rat poison works well

morethanpretty · 04-22-2011, 10:30 PM

If you want to outsmart something, you have to be at least 10% smarter than it.

monster · 04-24-2011, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

If you want to outsmart something, you have to be at least 10% smarter than it.

85% of squirrel problems are directly attributable to top storey mismanagement

12-01-2006, 12:14 PM	#1
chrisinhouston Professor Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Houston TX Posts: 1,857	Trying to outsmart a squirrel Last night when the Mrs and I turned in we heard something in the crawlspace part of the roof over our bedroom. It went on for an hour or so before the visitor decided to turn in for the night. We agreed it must be a squirell that had found a way into the attic. As I fly back to Atlant on Saturday, my wife left with explicit instructions to do something about it. So I spent an hour or so inspecting the overhangs of our roof and finally found a neatly carved entry point right under the soffit overhang. How the little bastard was able to hang on upside down and eat through the 1/2 inch plywood soffit I'll never figure out. So I put up the extension ladder and took a scrap of wood, the cordless drill and some drywall screws and plugged the hole. I mean, afterall it's a beautiful day here after a crappy one so most squirells with any sense are out feeding or playing or sunning themselves, right? I got on the computer and after awhile I here him in the attic above my office, so I go and get my pellet gun. This isn't any average Daisy Red Rider, it's a fancy ass German marksman model that shoots those lead pellets and has the stopping power just shy of a 22! I open the attic door and THERE HE IS! But I couldn't get the gun shouldered before he disappeared behind the furnace. I just spent close to 10 grand on a new AC and furnace system so shooting from the hi[ in the general direction of my new furnace was not an option So I went outside and up the ladder and removed the patch, now that I knew he was in there I realized without an escape route he be in there for good. Then I got the pellet gun and doned my camo hunting jacket (nice and warm as well as good cover). I picked a spot in the garden out in front of my house and sat down. Now at this point I have no idea if he slipped out while I was grabbing my gear inside but decided it was worth a wait. About an hour went by and I was reminded of how much we miss when we aren't paying attention and in a hurry outside or just inside the house. Several squirells bounced from tree to tree but I don't think either was the one in the attic, too big. I pondered what were the odds that he was still in the attic waiting for enough time to pass to escape. Some large vultures flew overhead, a male cardinal chased a female. No luck, I think I'll try again later this afternoon. This is kind of a fun way to waste my day! :p Oh and we definately have grey squirells here in Houston!

12-01-2006, 01:01 PM	#3
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	Dude...bad news. If you've got a bunch of squirrels, even if you knock out the I'm Alright rodent, another will just occupy his niche. That's ecology for ya. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

12-10-2006, 10:48 AM	#6
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Well, they chew through nuts....a board is a minor inconvenience. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

12-10-2006, 11:09 AM	#7
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	steel wool. or treat the wood with poison. or...wait until they're in there, attach a trap to the outside, then scare them into it from inside. also, jinx says......just shoot one, and put it's head on a spike near the hole as a warning. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

04-22-2011, 02:58 AM	#8
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Momdigr was all: "How in the world did he know to take the top off? This is just amazing!" Popdigr explained that's the only place the squirrel could smell the sunflower seeds that were inside, so that's where he chewed. Attached Images __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

12-01-2006, 04:19 PM	#4
chrisinhouston Professor Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Houston TX Posts: 1,857	Well, I think I may have won round one. Upon returning from lunch with my wife I saw the smallish squirell sitting on the edge of the roof as we entered the driveway, luckily he sprinted over the roof rather then ducking back into the attic. I proceeded to don my camo parka (brown wetland grass patern), grab my gun and find a comfy spot leaning against a big pine tree. I figured I'd wait and see if either the creature returns or another one emerges. I waited peacefully for an hour and watched countless squirells chasing each other from tree to tree and even had a few come with in 20 feet, but as I could not 100% ID the culprit I let them go; I'm not completely morally bankrupt. After an hour and my leg going to sleep, I climbed the ladder in hopes that the attic is empty and attached 2 scraps of English Walnut (left over from an old attempt at furniture repair). At least the walnut should be harder then the ceder siding or the plywood.

12-10-2006, 09:55 AM	#5
chrisinhouston Professor Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Houston TX Posts: 1,857	My wife phoned me yesterday (I'm back at my parent's house in Atlanta) to report she heard squirrels in the attic again. I told her to go look where I had boarded up the whole near the roof. She reported that they have made a new hole through the wood and that while watching she saw 4 squirrels come out of the hole. I think we have some kind of mutant part beaver squirrels!

04-22-2011, 07:38 AM	#9
GunMaster357 Professor Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Brest (FRANCE) Posts: 1,837	Some seeds with poison in the attic, maybe? And, yes, I'm morally corrupted. In case you've got children be very careful if you choose to employ this method. __________________ "War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce

04-22-2011, 10:37 AM	#10
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Any attempt to outsmart squirrels is doomed to failure. I'm tellin' yah, they're going to survive The Big One along with the roaches. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

04-22-2011, 09:53 PM	#11
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	Outsmart squirrels? You're nuts! __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

04-22-2011, 10:05 PM	#13
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	rat poison works well __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

04-22-2011, 10:30 PM	#14
morethanpretty Thats "Miss Zipper Neck" to you. Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: little town (but not the littlest) in texas Posts: 2,957	If you want to outsmart something, you have to be at least 10% smarter than it. __________________ Addicts may suck dick for coke, but love came up with the idea to put a dick in there to begin with. -Jack O'Brien

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