Clodfobble FAQ's

lookout123 · 07-21-2010, 06:13 PM

The earth orbits the sun only because Clodfobble told the sun to stand still.

Clodfobble · 07-21-2010, 07:27 PM

That's not even a question, let alone a frequently asked one.

Here's one I get at least 2-3 times a week, often by more than one person within a single grocery trip:

Quote:

You've got a great little helper there, doncha?

Answer: No, I don't. I've got a chihuahua on espresso, who makes grocery shopping damn near impossible. It stopped being cute years ago, I assure you.

SteveDallas · 07-22-2010, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

Here's one I get at least 2-3 times a week, often by more than one person within a single grocery trip:

This violates a principle I've been working on formulating for a while: the Principle Of Least Human Interaction.

Essentially: there's very little up-side to me saying something like that to you. And there's a lot of potential down-side (as you've demonstrated).

So why should I say it? More to the point why do so many people feel compelled to say it?

Spexxvet · 07-22-2010, 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

This violates a principle I've been working on formulating for a while: the Principle Of Least Human Interaction.

Essentially: there's very little up-side to me saying something like that to you. And there's a lot of potential down-side (as you've demonstrated).

Best illustrated by asking a woman "when are you due?" when she's not.

spudcon · 07-22-2010, 07:55 AM

How about a recipe then?

TheMercenary · 07-22-2010, 09:55 AM

@ clod.

Clodfobble · 07-22-2010, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spudcon

How about a recipe then?

Take your pick.

SteveDallas · 07-22-2010, 02:01 PM

Right. And if she IS pregnant, unless she's a relative or close family friend, wtf business of mine is it when she's due?

lookout123 · 07-22-2010, 02:50 PM

Wow. I screwed that up. I started the thread then went to a birthday party/8 hour happy hour - guess I should have doublechecked the thread.

My plan was to give an answer and have dwellars submit the question tailored to the answer. Kind of a FAQ but written in reverse.

xoxoxoBruce · 07-22-2010, 03:03 PM

Threads = paper boats... set 'em adrift, and they go where they want.

classicman · 07-22-2010, 03:07 PM

lol @ bruce - Kinda like herding cats . . .

Clodfobble · 07-22-2010, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

So why should I say it? More to the point why do so many people feel compelled to say it?

I think it usually comes down to the fact that they were embarrassed to realize they were staring, and felt compelled to cover up their embarrassment with a comment. So far nobody's had the balls to come right out and say what they're really thinking, which is either, "Wow, I'm sorry," or "You should spank him more," depending on the person.

Sundae · 08-03-2010, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

I think it usually comes down to the fact that they were embarrassed to realize they were staring, and felt compelled to cover up their embarrassment with a comment. So far nobody's had the balls to come right out and say what they're really thinking, which is either, "Wow, I'm sorry," or "You should spank him more," depending on the person.

I thought of this when I was in the library today.
Woman in front of me, baby in pushchair, toddler on foot.
I waited an extra couple of minutes (literal minutes, which feels like about 15) because the little boy did not want to hand over his wallchart to the librarian to scan. And then he didn't want it rolled up. Or put in a bag.

So a couple of extra minutes of, "Come on Matthew. Matthew. Matthew. Come on, give the lady the paper. Matthew, Matthew. Come on." While she stood at the counter, the baby in the pushchair cried and we all stood on attandance for a toddler. Now I know what my Mum would have done in this situation. But I also know I grew up terrified of her temper and disapproval.

So I took a breath and started reading one of the books. Not ostentatiously. I no longer have pink hair. Just in the way I always do in a queue. After all, the child may have been autistic. Or maybe the mother is just focusing on being reasonable and loving. And I wasn't in a hurry.

I did roll my eyes when she stopped to have a conversation with him RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE AUTOMATIC DOORS!!!! Ahem.
Ah well, you can't win them all.
I guess there is a fine line between letting your own child know how important they are... and teaching children that other people just don't matter. And like I said, threads like My Child Is A Nutter (as well as my work in school) do make me stop and think more and condemn less.

Clodfobble · 07-22-2010, 07:08 PM

Oh yeah, here's another frequently-asked question:

Quote:

So what's for dinner?

Answer: Hell if I know.

xoxoxoBruce · 07-22-2010, 09:26 PM

Yeah, but I bet you can rattle off a whole list of what's not for dinner.

07-21-2010, 06:13 PM	#1
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	Clodfobble FAQ's The earth orbits the sun only because Clodfobble told the sun to stand still. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

07-22-2010, 07:55 AM	#5
spudcon Beware of potatoes Join Date: May 2007 Location: Upstate NY, USA Posts: 2,078	How about a recipe then? __________________ "I believe that being despised by the despicable is as good as being admired by the admirable."

07-22-2010, 09:55 AM	#6
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	@ clod. __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!

07-22-2010, 02:50 PM	#9
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	Wow. I screwed that up. I started the thread then went to a birthday party/8 hour happy hour - guess I should have doublechecked the thread. My plan was to give an answer and have dwellars submit the question tailored to the answer. Kind of a FAQ but written in reverse. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

07-22-2010, 03:03 PM	#10
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Threads = paper boats... set 'em adrift, and they go where they want. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

07-22-2010, 02:01 PM	#8
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	Right. And if she IS pregnant, unless she's a relative or close family friend, wtf business of mine is it when she's due?

07-22-2010, 03:07 PM	#11
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	lol @ bruce - Kinda like herding cats . . . __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

07-22-2010, 09:26 PM	#15
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Yeah, but I bet you can rattle off a whole list of what's not for dinner. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

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