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Old 06-24-2012, 11:12 AM   #4606
jimhelm
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And his wife said, "ok, Dick. After you."
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Old 06-24-2012, 09:46 PM   #4607
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and then Saint Peter fainted.
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Old 06-27-2012, 02:37 PM   #4608
classicman
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Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning

A small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.
Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 2826 bodies so far
and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.
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Old 06-27-2012, 06:21 PM   #4609
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My sister's plane crashed into an Irish cemetery and she died on 9/11 you insensitive bastard.
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Old 06-27-2012, 06:24 PM   #4610
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spexxvet View Post
My sister's plane crashed into an Irish cemetery and she died on 9/11 you insensitive bastard.
Your sister was a terrorist?
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Old 06-27-2012, 09:28 PM   #4611
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Terror, Terror, Gay Marriage...be afraid.
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Old 06-30-2012, 03:08 PM   #4612
Rhianne
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I bought a strobe light today but when I got the thing back home it refused to work on any of the different settings.

I went back to the store. "Have you tried switching it off and on?" asked the assistant.
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Old 07-03-2012, 09:40 AM   #4613
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from Private Eye magazine
Attached Images
 
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Old 07-03-2012, 01:18 PM   #4614
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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Old 07-04-2012, 04:43 PM   #4615
Gravdigr
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One day a five year old asks his dad "Daddy, can I have new bicycle?"

The father responds "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

Confused, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer."

At 12, the boy again asks "Dad, can I have new bicycle?"

Again, the dad responds with "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

And again, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer."

At eighteen the boy asks "Dad, can I have a new car?"

The dad asks "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

The boy responds "As a matter of fact, it can."

The dad says "Good, now go fuck yourself."
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Old 07-16-2012, 08:44 PM   #4616
monster
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Old 07-16-2012, 10:28 PM   #4617
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Old 07-18-2012, 06:14 PM   #4618
Gravdigr
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
...Sometimes she wants to explain her new interpretation of quantum physics...
If quantum physics is true, and there is a universe for all possible histories and futures, then there is a universe where I am banging Emma Watson.

And that's awesome.
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Old 07-18-2012, 06:44 PM   #4619
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Grav...the key word there is 'possible'


:p
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:46 PM   #4620
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
If quantum physics is true, and there is a universe for all possible histories and futures, then there is a universe where I am banging Emma Watson.

And that's awesome.
By that logic, there is also a universe where Rupert Grint is banging you.
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