Merc - Wtf?

[BigV]

You're certainly clever enough to see the contradiction, no, paradox in your first sentence. ha ha. It's like demanding respect or seizing the right of way. You can't take either one, you can only receive it from someone else. Not tolerating intolerance is the very definition of perpetuating intolerance.

What's your position on judgmental attitudes?

[Ibby]

I deny that there is a paradox. "Tolerance" has multiple meanings/uses.
"I refuse to [abide or ignore] [racial, sexual, gender, or any other form of oppression/discrimination/hate]." is what I said. I just appreciate the wordplay.

[Undertoad]

if you want to defeat your enemy sing his song

[richlevy]

I thought Merc was the sanest and most literate hard right-winger we had. With his departure it's left to UG and Adak. Granted, this means that I'm guaranteed a %100 winning streak, but it's like the opposing team went into the locker room and decided to play their second string for the second half.

[jimhelm]

Originally Posted by Ibby

I refuse to tolerate intolerance. Tolerating intolerance is perpetuating intolerance. Merc's a bigot. Playing nice with bigots isn't a game I'm fond of.

But you do tolerate your own intolerance toward people who see our species as having only two genders.

Merc is a grown man. Hes just not that into us.

[footfootfoot]

I always liked having Merc around and I didn't always agree with him, but he backed up his words with reasons and beliefs rather than soundbites he learned to mimic form someone else.

[orthodoc]

I think Merc's leaving is a loss to the Cellar.

He could be crude to you at times, Ibby, but he didn't have the corner on that market. You've thrown offensive epithets like 'cunt' as a blanket insult at anyone who disagrees with your views. Your sig says you're a misandrist heterophobe and you believe your intolerance of those who don't agree with your views of sex and gender to be completely justified, yet you throw the word 'bigot' around without any sense of irony.

You have no life experience yet, which is not necessarily your fault, but a little of the modesty you claim for yourself would go a long way. You'll grow faster if you stop labeling people and realize that everyone has not just 2, but 22 sides. No one is worthless.

[Ibby]

[Big Sarge]

Face it, Merc meant far more to this board than Ibby. We've shown you tolerance and support even though you have a different set of norms/values. It seems to me that you are the bigot

[sexobon]

[IMHO]Merc and I share a background which at any given time only a few thousand people in the world hold and among whom there are similarities in key aspects of their psychological profiles. While our paths haven't crossed outside the Cellar, I believe that Merc's interaction in the politics thread, current affairs thread, and with Ibby are non-factors in his non-participation. Same goes for the ribbing he's taken from dwellars (including me) on some of these subjects. Merc is thick skinned. I believe that Merc simply lost respect for members he had previously held in esteem when they allowed a thin skinned adult member of this community to hide behind their skirts by labeling Merc a bully. There are others who feel similarly, who expressed a similar opinion and reduced their participation. The Merc is conspicuous among them only because he ceased participation.

A difference between the Merc and I is that I was introduced to the Cellar by a former dwellar (Tonchi) who provided insight and I had time to do personality assessments as a lurker before registering. My expectations coming in were titrated to the community. That's why I've always said that I'm just here for the entertainment. Merc didn't have that advantage and Merc is disappoint. I don't blame him: I would be too. I can take it or leave it just as easily as Merc except that I knew coming into the community better than to reveal any of my current IRL information for others to judge me on; so, it's not detrimental for me to stay.[/IMHO]

[Ibby]

Originally Posted by Big Sarge

Face it, Merc meant far more to this board than Ibby. We've shown you tolerance and support even though you have a different set of norms/values. It seems to me that you are the bigot

i'm a bigot for being against bigots. Kay.

[infinite monkey]

This is like an Onion article, right?

Youse guys are funny.

[DanaC]

Originally Posted by sexobon

[IMHO]I believe that Merc simply lost respect for members he had previously held in esteem when they allowed a thin skinned adult member of this community to hide behind their skirts by labeling Merc a bully. There are others who feel similarly, who expressed a similar opinion and reduced their participation. The Merc is conspicuous among them only because he ceased participation.

.[/IMHO]

I assume some of that is aimed at me?

If so that's a shame. I always liked Merc. I always clashed with him, and I thought he was being a bully at some points. But I still liked him.

@ Ibs: this thread was started because I miss Merc. I know, as do we all, that you don't. It doesn't need repeating every time anybody says something nice about him.

For all that I will stick up for you in the face of bigotry (as I hope you owuld do the same), there comes a point where your own hatred of intolerance can take you into an intolerant place. You say you hold a grudge? How is that not intolerance? You reduce other members to a single facet of their personality or history and can't see how dehumanising that is. People are not black and white they are every shade of grey.

All of us are prejudiced in some way. Most of us harbour some bigotry, whether we recognise it or not. It doesn't remove our essential humanity and, except in extreme cases, it doesn't define us. Grudges do you no favours in life. All they do is set or add to a deep core of negativity and anger. You can hate bigotry without hating the person behind it. Because that person is really not so different from you. May not seem like it sometimes, but they're really not.

All you are doing in your 'fight against bigotry' is perpetuating the hatred. Entrenching those whose views you despise, in those views. And frustrating those whose support is naturally yours. Someone comes for you, specifically, on the grounds of your gender and I'm there at your side. Someone posts outrageously bigotted comments and I'm in the argument. But this is just nastiness. It is no different to Merc coming into a thread about you and randomly posting how much he dislikes you. If the rest of the people in this thread were swayed by your words, then you would be engaging in a form of bullying, deliberately making the Cellar an unwelcoming place for another individual. You have not been attacked in this thread. Any attacks by Merc are in the past and are no part of this thread. You are the aggressor.

[Big Sarge]

Well said, DanaC. I wish I had the gift of your words. I often am unable to express my opinion without seeming "hateful".

Ibby - I hope I have not offended you with my comments. I have always seen Merc as a friend and I felt like you were attacking him. Let's allow this thread to go back to the original intent.

[Undertoad]

Any attacks by Merc are in the past

Five YEARS in the past.

Around here, rapists get five years.

If you want to defeat your enemy sing his song. What would be Merc's response to finding that you and he had much in common? A reevaluation of everything.

When you hate, who do you hurt the most? Hate hurts you.