22 Things Happy People Do Differently [really?]

[Nirvana]

It’s quite simple. Happy people have good habits that enhance their lives. They do things differently. Ask any happy person, and they will tell you that they …

1. Don’t hold grudges.

Happy people understand that it’s better to forgive and forget than to let their negative feelings crowd out their positive feelings. Holding a grudge has a lot of detrimental effects on your wellbeing, including increased depression, anxiety, and stress. Why let anyone who has wronged you have power over you? If you let go of all your grudges, you’ll gain a clear conscience and enough energy to enjoy the good things in life.

2. Treat everyone with kindness.

Did you know that it has been scientifically proven that being kind makes you happier? Every time you perform a selfless act, your brain produces serotonin, a hormone that eases tension and lifts your spirits. Not only that, but treating people with love, dignity, and respect also allows you to build stronger relationships.

3. See problems as challenges.

The word “problem” is never part of a happy person’s vocabulary. A problem is viewed as a drawback, a struggle, or an unstable situation while a challenge is viewed as something positive like an opportunity, a task, or a dare. Whenever you face an obstacle, try looking at it as a challenge.

4. Express gratitude for what they already have.

There’s a popular saying that goes something like this: “The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.” You will have a deeper sense of contentment if you count your blessings instead of yearning for what you don’t have.

5. Dream big.

People who get into the habit of dreaming big are more likely to accomplish their goals than those who don’t. If you dare to dream big, your mind will put itself in a focused and positive state.

6. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Happy people ask themselves, “Will this problem matter a year from now?” They understand that life’s too short to get worked up over trivial situations. Letting things roll off your back will definitely put you at ease to enjoy the more important things in life.

7. Speak well of others.

Being nice feels better than being mean. As fun as gossiping is, it usually leaves you feeling guilty and resentful. Saying nice things about other people encourages you to think positive, non-judgmental thoughts.

8. Never make excuses.

Benjamin Franklin once said, “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” Happy people don’t make excuses or blame others for their own failures in life. Instead, they own up to their mistakes and, by doing so, they proactively try to change for the better.

9. Get absorbed into the present.

Happy people don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. They savor the present. They let themselves get immersed in whatever they’re doing at the moment. Stop and smell the roses.

10. Wake up at the same time every morning.

Have you noticed that a lot of successful people tend to be early risers? Waking up at the same time every morning stabilizes your circadian rhythm, increases productivity, and puts you in a calm and centered state.

11. Avoid social comparison.

Everyone works at his own pace, so why compare yourself to others? If you think you’re better than someone else, you gain an unhealthy sense of superiority. If you think someone else is better than you, you end up feeling bad about yourself. You’ll be happier if you focus on your own progress and praise others on theirs.

12. Choose friends wisely.

Misery loves company. That’s why it’s important to surround yourself with optimistic people who will encourage you to achieve your goals. The more positive energy you have around you, the better you will feel about yourself.

13. Never seek approval from others.

Happy people don’t care what others think of them. They follow their own hearts without letting naysayers discourage them. They understand that it’s impossible to please everyone. Listen to what people have to say, but never seek anyone’s approval but your own.

14. Take the time to listen.

Talk less; listen more. Listening keeps your mind open to others’ wisdoms and outlooks on the world. The more intensely you listen, the quieter your mind gets, and the more content you feel.

15. Nurture social relationships.

A lonely person is a miserable person. Happy people understand how important it is to have strong, healthy relationships. Always take the time to see and talk to your family, friends, or significant other.

16. Meditate.

Meditating silences your mind and helps you find inner peace. You don’t have to be a zen master to pull it off. Happy people know how to silence their minds anywhere and anytime they need to calm their nerves.

17. Eat well.

Junk food makes you sluggish, and it’s difficult to be happy when you’re in that kind of state. Everything you eat directly affects your body’s ability to produce hormones, which will dictate your moods, energy, and mental focus. Be sure to eat foods that will keep your mind and body in good shape.

18. Exercise.

Studies have shown that exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft does. Exercising also boosts your self-esteem and gives you a higher sense of self-accomplishment.

19. Live minimally.

Happy people rarely keep clutter around the house because they know that extra belongings weigh them down and make them feel overwhelmed and stressed out. Some studies have concluded that Europeans are a lot happier than Americans are, which is interesting because they live in smaller homes, drive simpler cars, and own fewer items.

20. Tell the truth.

Lying stresses you out, corrodes your self-esteem, and makes you unlikeable. The truth will set you free. Being honest improves your mental health and builds others’ trust in you. Always be truthful, and never apologize for it.

21. Establish personal control.

Happy people have the ability to choose their own destinies. They don’t let others tell them how they should live their lives. Being in complete control of one’s own life brings positive feelings and a great sense of self-worth.

22. Accept what cannot be changed.

Once you accept the fact that life is not fair, you’ll be more at peace with yourself. Instead of obsessing over how unfair life is, just focus on what you can control and change it for the better.

[wolf]

Well, that's getting posted on my desk with additional copies in the drawer in case someone wants one.

[Gravdigr]

This does not make me happy.

[DanaC]

I'd go along with many of those. I practice quite a few.

One of the really big ones for me is not holding grudges. The last time I allowed myself to get drawn into holding a grudge against someone and basically existing in a state of enmity with them was a few years ago, when I was heavily involved in the local labour party. I remember making a conscious decision to just drop all enmity and be civil to people I had to work alongside. The being civil part was easy, but dropping the underlying enmity was less so.

That one caught me off balance because it began as a factional 'team' kind of thing and then morphed into something personal.

Other than that, I'd say it's a good long while since I allowed real grudges any head space. Likewise revenge fantasies. My mind wandering briefly down such a path is fine, but getting caught up with such deeply negative emotion is just not helpful.

I'm not sure I agree with dreaming big as a factor. For a start it seems to equate 'success' (by whose terms I'm not sure) with happiness. There are many people out there who have dreamt big and 'succeeded' and yet are not happy. Then again if your dream, your whole life, was to find a man who loves you and bring up two happy children and you achieve that dream, why would you be unhappy?

[Sundae]

Does dreaming of winning the Lottery count?

I really, really make an effort not to hold grudges.
And not to indulge in revenge fantasies. I mean I'm much better than I was.
But they ambush my emotions sometimes.

[DanaC]

Actually, I didn't mean revenge fantasies...though the same applies. I actually meant to say vindication fantasies. They're a bastard they are. Seductive, they draw you in.

[limey]

No. 17 Dana :p
I think dream big simply means big-for-you, like you say. Like, say, move to a Scottish island . Not everyone's idea of success.

Sent by thought transference

[elSicomoro]

to this list

[Lola Bunny]

I used to do most of what's on the list. I'd say I used to feel happier.

[monster]

Dream Big: Shoot for the moon. If you miss, you'll still land among the stars.

[xoxoxoBruce]

In the cold dead vacuum of space.

[monster]

maybe. Or maybe you dreamed big enough to deal with that

[footfootfoot]

Oh Christ. I might as well have stayed at the monastery.

[Gravdigr]

Monastery...I've always preferred the term 'monkery'.