My Kid is a Damn Nutter

[Clodfobble]

We had our first appointment at Thoughtful House today. I couldn't be happier with the way things went.

First off, the office is nothing like a doctor's office. The "waiting room" is like a living room full of toys, including a Wii, and the "exam rooms" are carpeted, with bookcases and couches and more toys. No tables with rolled paper, no scales, no fluorescents. The doctors are automatically familiar with such practices as casually blocking the door with their chair, so there is no need to constantly pull the child away from it.

Then we got over an hour of dedicated face time with the nutritionist. I had been a little unhappy at the idea that we would supposedly be having all these tests ordered at this appointment, but then the followup appointment to discuss results and act on them wasn't for another six weeks. But it turns out the tests really do take that long, and I will be anything but idle in the meantime. Aside from a huge packet of information regarding a variety of dietary things, this is what we walked away with:

--Immediately discontinue his vitamin/mineral supplements and his probiotics for two weeks, to prep for the lab testing. (They will confound the results otherwise.) This has the added benefit of finding out if the coconut contained in them is giving him problems--a likely possibility, because we had to stop the coconut yogurt after it made his diarrhea even worse (I wouldn't have thought that was possible, but it turns out it was.) In addition, don't let him eat any fruits or nuts for two days prior to collecting the samples.

--To keep up the "you must take your medicine every night" routine, and to anticipate the high probability that the lab results will show a massive yeast overgrowth among other things, we will instead be giving him apple cider vinegar in his little med syringe instead. This does not kill yeast directly, but it breaks down the mucousy housing material, so to speak, thus making the anti-fungal more effective if/when it is eventually prescribed. Good for the digestive tract even if it turns out he has no fungus after all.

--It's likely he doesn't have a problem with rice itself, because if it were a food sensitivity we should have seen the improvement within a day or two. Instead what we saw was sudden, massive black poop after five rice-free days. This is indicative of a change in the bowel's general equilibrium, which makes it likely that it was the yeast in the rice bread that he was specifically craving. So he can have rice back, but not his rice bread sandwiches for now. No problem, I've already gotten him to accept the idea of a sandwich made with his waffles instead.

--After two weeks, we take the poop and pee samples and FedEx them off to the labs. Then begins the real fun: a full bowel clean-out. Variable doses of magnesium citrate until he has reached his target of pooping at least once an hour, for as many days as it takes. I have been warned that terrible, horrible things may come out of him at this time, of a size that I could never, ever have imagined could be contained in his tiny body. He is not done until what is coming out is basically clear liquid.

--General examination of his diet shows that he needs more protein than he's getting, especially early in the day. If I can't get him to eat bacon and eggs in the morning, I need to start putting protein powder in his waffles. And, if I'm up for it at some point before the next appointment, I should really do a trial of removing corn--as in, the tostadas and tortilla chips he eats every day. Yeah, uh, we'll see about that one. Not right now, that's for sure.