Humor...I Need Humor...

[BrianR]

> John Doe strode into the bedroom , wearing His
> leather Postal Worker's uniform. He sneered at the
> bound and gagged figure on the bed, as He reached
> into His latex mail bag. Jane Doe, a 29 year old
> schoolgirl, looked up at her Master, her eyes a
> mixture of fear and desire. She gasped as He brought
> a knife with a 9 ~ inch blade out of the bag.
>
> "I saw something on the Internet which I want us to
> try," He said sternly,
>
> "Are you willing?"
>
> Jane nodded eagerly and mumbled, "yeff Mather".
>
> John smiled as He bent close and cut her free of her
> bonds.
>
> "Strip", He ordered as He began to remove His own
> clothes..
>
> Jane quickly complied, wondering what new delights
> her beloved Master had in store for her.
>
> "Lay back on the bed", He commanded.
>
> Jane did so. John then laid on top of her.
>
> "Tonight my dear", He whispered while reaching for
> the light switch.. "We are going ...........
> Vanilla!"
>
> "NOOOOOOoooooooooo" , cried Jane as the room plunged
> into darkness.
>
> The above tale is true. John eventually left Jane to
> move in with a vanilla woman. They now have a 24/7
> vanilla lifestyle, regularly enjoying home
> improvements, Tupperware parties and only having sex
> 3 times a year.
>
> Jane was more fortunate and now attends Vanillas
> Anonymous, with help and guidance she is slowly
> recovering. Only last week she was able to stand up
> and say,
>
> "I have the right to more than one sexual position!"
>
>
> Vanilla is dangerous and should not be practiced at
> home. If anyone offers you vanilla sex, just say No.
>
>
> This has been a BDSM safety awareness announcement.