Be a post whore!

[DanaC]

I'll sponsor ya

[Sundae]

Thanks hon!
Here is the official website. http://gemstonewalk.co.uk/
I've signed up Mum and I. It might be that donations are accepted online, which would be marvellous.

Trust me, I'll be all over the board with it in the next few months

[monster]

please can i not have to get up in 5 hours, because I really really don't want to go to bed yet......

[sexobon]

Hush li'l darlin', it's time for you to be Cellar dreamin'. Nighty nite.

[Sundae]

Thinking and preparing for school tomorrow and remembered something.
Nowhere else to put it. No innuendo there as I am about to write about children.

As well as my two official wards, I also work unofficially with two other boys.
Both are 5-6 and have difficulty reading and writing. One, H, I have been charged with sitting on the carpet with, to ensure his attention (something I should be doing with Tiger, but Tiger only really requires an occasional nudge, being a conformist. Ideally I sit btween the two and try to stop Tiger nuzzling my arm for comfort).

I've found with Tiger personally, and from training courses, that children on the Autism spectrum respond well to music. S is not Autistic, but may be dyslexic. And he loves singing. So with Tiger and S I often incorporate songs when we are learning, especially on the Word Wall where words are out of context. Example - Tiger spent three weeks unable to get Where and There. So I sang him A Mouse Lived in a Windmill in Old Amsterdam, including a finger dance of a little mouse with clogs on... And S had real trouble with ladder - so I kept singing him the THRASS mat song (phonics teaching tool, if you don't know it don't worry) about My Dog Spot. but changing it to his name. In the song, the dog "climbs a ladder to the top". Yes, he finally recognised ladder. In the middle of other words, on its own and in sentences. And then we got a book with ladder in (Can You Get Our Ball?) and he knew it by sight. I danced the fandango. In my head.

But H.
H!
He started a new series of books in the last week of term.
These started including more complex words, including those on the THRASS mats. It all ties in, see?
So I began singing to him, as I did the other two.
Tiger grins and joins in. S smiles and enjoys it - H recoiled in embarrassment. And giggled uneasily. As if I'd licked him or something.
I persevered, but realised he really, honestly finds it extremely intimate and embarrassing to be sung to. Just for the record [obligatory] I was singing to him, in the classroom, not sitting him on my lap or singing into his ear or anything even approaching a line that can't be crossed.

Need to find a new approach for him next week.
Might see how he reacts to the Singing Cat.
I'm not obsessed with the singing idea, but THRASS imparts a lot of spelling systems via song, and the children sing every day in Assembly, culminating in a Music Assembly once a week.

Might have to ask the amazing Mrs J (HLTA I work with) for ideas.

[Clodfobble]

If you're sure it's the social/intimacy aspect, you might try puppets or toy action figures, pretending it's them singing to each other rather than you singing to him. Or he might respond better to a simple recording of you singing instead of sitting through it in person. I don't know what the Singing Cat is, but if it's a separate object that plays songs, that would serve the same effect.

But there is also the possibility that it is the actual sound of singing that bothers him, and he's just being as polite as he can about it when what he really wants to do is clamp his hands over his ears. Both of my kids absolutely couldn't stand to listen to people singing in person, although singing on TV or the radio or whatever was fine. Minifob is long past it now, and Minifobette has learned to accept her therapists and teachers singing, but anyone else even starting to hum is still going to be met with tears.

[Griff]

I've had a guy for two years who is doing better now, but last year he'd put his hand over his aide's mouth every time she tried to sing. He responded better if the first time he heard a song it was from staff not a recording. *shrug* Good luck!

[Aliantha]

Maybe he's just the sort of kid who thinks people who sing in public are embarrassing. Mav is a lot like that. He wouldn't respond well to it, but Max would.

[Pico and ME]

I am so fed up with my stepson and how I react to him that I am contemplating moving to Tucson to live with my mother. This morning I got so mad that I threw his alarm clock against the wall and broke it. I hate myself for being this way...for getting so irrationally mad at him all the time. I suck.

[monster]

What did he do? I'm thinking doesn't sound irrational to me if he was a shit.......

[monster]

...better the alarm clock than him, right?

[Pico and ME]

Its such a looooong list. And its been building up since he moved back in after Christmas.

He just wont mind me. I tell him not to slam the door when he comes home late at night. He still does it. I get on him about it, he gives me lip and so I yell. I tell him not to do laundry at the beginning of the week (when I do it), he still does AND leaves his stuff in the dryer to boot. I get on him about it, he gives me lip and so I yell. I ask him to clean the bathroom, he doesn't do it. A few days later I get on him about it, he gives me lip and so I yell.

Lately, he has been spending most nights at a new girlfriends, but he neglects to turn off his alarm clock, so it goes off in the morning and I have get out of bed to deal with it. This has happened many times before and I have told him to stop it, but he doesn't. So this morning I threw it against the wall in a fit of anger.

It's really all very petty and actually just a power struggle, I know. But the few things I ask for he totally ignores AND IT PISSES ME OFF!

And I know I am a jerk for feeling this way, ...afterwards.

[Aliantha]

Why doesn't his father deal with him? surely he must have something to say about his own son's behaviour...

[Pico and ME]

Oh, he's not bothered by it. He thinks I am just nagging him and fighting with him too much. Truth is, I am like a terrier or pit bull when it comes to my house rules. Otherwise, the boys would just run roughshod over me. It would be nice if I didn't care.

eta - My husband will take my side when I need him to. For instance, I asked him to talk to the boy about cleaning the bathroom, he did and the boy cleaned the bathroom today. Also about the laundry and the alarm clock. But it doesn't stop him from still doing it all again later on. Its really frustrating.

[Aliantha]

Oh well, at least you can ask your husband for help then. I get kind of annoyed with my kids for repeatedly doing the same annoying stuff over and over. I think it's part of growing up in a way, and they probably will keep being annoying till they have their own place and are forced to wake up to themselves. Either that or have kids of their own who are annoying.

It's not so good if he doesn't respect your house rules though, and I don't think there's anything wrong with being strict about them so that you don't have to feel like you're always picking up after someone else. That's simply not fair.