What's upsetting you today? - Page 24

Cloud · 08-09-2007, 06:08 PM

not enough sleep last night (because I stayed up too late reading) so I feel crappy this afternoon.

DanaC · 08-09-2007, 06:19 PM

*sighs* I am low today. I went out with my friend for a drink after a meeting last night (the friend I've mentioned before, the one I am head over heels in love with :P). I haven't said anything to hm about the way I feel, because I am not sure where he's at on the whole getting involved thing. So I did a little digging in my conversation with him.

Ha. I know where he's at, I spent the last 5 years happily detemined to remain uninvolved. Of course, that's before I spent several months working closely with a friend of 3 years, and then unexpectedly fell in love. He's still in that place, y'know. He's had a girlfriend since his divorce, but he ended it after a year, because she 'wanted to be number one in his life' and that place is occupied by his son. Since then he's been studiously avoiding getting involved.

I knew some of this already.

Thing is, there may come a time, when someone will flick that switch with him, and he'll want to get involved...like he flicked that switch with me...but, clearly, it hasn't happened yet, therefore it isn't me that'll change his mind on this.

So, I am trying to get my head around it and just try to stop seeing him in that way, just try and continue being his good friend, cause having him as a friend, well it isn't nothing y'know?

I am just a little devastated though, by the realisation that it ain't ever goin to be. I don't fall in love easy or often...I've never felt so drawn to a person, my entire life. I'll get over it. But it sucks.

Shawnee123 · 08-09-2007, 06:34 PM

You don't know you won't be the one to flip his switch. Sometimes people absolutely don't want to be involved, BUT, they wake one day to a flipped switch.

You're a great person. Just keep being his friend, enjoy that, and who knows what could happen?

DanaC · 08-09-2007, 06:41 PM

Quote:

Just keep being his friend, enjoy that, and who knows what could happen?

Good advice. That's kind of where I'm at...but I have to very forcibly let go of that as a possibility (for now), because right now it's driving me crazy.

DanaC · 08-09-2007, 07:03 PM

Oh..and I want a cigarette. I really, really want a fucking cigarette. I was doing okay on the not smoking thing, I even stopped using the nicotine gum after the second week, but today I've wound myself up and now I really, really want a cig.

HungLikeJesus · 08-09-2007, 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC

Oh..and I want a cigarette. I really, really want a fucking cigarette. I was doing okay on the not smoking thing, I even stopped using the nicotine gum after the second week, but today I've wound myself up and now I really, really want a cig.

Hey, Dana, it's nice being almost in your time zone. I'm on vacation this week and must have missed that you were quitting smoking. I hope you can hold on, resist the temptation, and overcome your addiction.

Good luck.

DanaC · 08-09-2007, 07:13 PM

Actually, I think that's the first I've mentioned it. Which is unusual for me. Usually when I stop smoking, its all I can talk about for the first few days at least :P

Griff · 08-09-2007, 07:20 PM

Look, you've got the oral fixation for the smokes and a perfectly decent guy on the next bar stool. Maybe flint should draw a picture... just saying...

DanaC · 08-09-2007, 07:30 PM

Could he make the picture look like my friend? :P

Shawnee123 · 08-10-2007, 09:56 AM

My hair won't stay out of my face today and it's driving me freaking bonkers.

Shawnee123 · 08-10-2007, 01:02 PM

Today I am happy, sad, happy, sad, happy, sad. I am so frustrated and yet hope-filled. Thrilled and scared. Rollercoaster madness. Argh...can someone give me advice without knowing what the hell is wrong? Just....blah!

LabRat · 08-10-2007, 01:21 PM

Try these.

Deuce · 08-10-2007, 02:43 PM

my silent phone

DucksNuts · 08-11-2007, 06:10 AM

I wrecked one of my mag wheels. WAAAAHHHHH

Some dumbfuck driving a Ftruck tried to pull out into traffic in front of me and I had no where to go but into the concrete tram island.

DanaC · 08-12-2007, 04:26 PM

Yah, boo sucks to fucking Summer. There....that clear enough? Mum (who lives half way down the hill from me)* went on holiday yesterday morning for a week...two of my best friends (my ex and a mutual friend who is now his new girlfriend) went to Prague this morning for five days. My friend, from earlier in this thread, has gone to ground (I think he's probably in Tyneside). I've also been trying to get hold of another friend and comrade for past two days, just found out this aft she's in fucking Nice.

Y'know, I can go days without seeing people and that's fine...but knowing that hardly any of the people I might normally phone (or be phoned by) for a chat, or call in for a coffee, are around, all of a sudden all I want is fucking company. Go figure.

Hate this. Been fighting off this 'left behind' feeling all fricken day. I knew it was comin actually, because mum and the two J's I knew were going away. Bollox. I do quite well by myself unless I know I don't have a choice but to be by myself at which point I am rubbish at it. Probably doesn't help that I'm already borderline depressed to start with (seriously limits the people I'd voluntarily interract with at the best of times). Been doin the whole manic to on the floor, and back to manic again roller coaster all frikken week. And wouldn'y y'just know this weekend would be a slow one in the Cellar.....why? Because everyone's out enjoying the Summer.**

Thank God for Sundae Girl, that's what I say, an hour long phone conversation helped ground me. I don't mean an hour of me saying how pissed off i am : An hour of just normal chit chat.

* I live at the top of the hill, in the center of the village; halfway down the hill lives my mum; at the bottom of the hill live my brother and his family, and my friend/ex. Seriously, it's like at some point my living arrangements took on a nursery rhyme aspect.
**Yes I know... I live in a beautiful part of the country and have a dog and therefore ample reason to be out enjoying the Summer, and indeed I have done precisely that for portions of the day, but right now I'm wallowing in self-pity, so bleh.

08-09-2007, 06:08 PM	#346
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	not enough sleep last night (because I stayed up too late reading) so I feel crappy this afternoon. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

08-09-2007, 06:34 PM	#348
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	You don't know you won't be the one to flip his switch. Sometimes people absolutely don't want to be involved, BUT, they wake one day to a flipped switch. You're a great person. Just keep being his friend, enjoy that, and who knows what could happen? __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

08-09-2007, 07:20 PM	#353
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Look, you've got the oral fixation for the smokes and a perfectly decent guy on the next bar stool. Maybe flint should draw a picture... just saying... __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

08-10-2007, 09:56 AM	#355
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	My hair won't stay out of my face today and it's driving me freaking bonkers. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

08-10-2007, 01:02 PM	#356
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Today I am happy, sad, happy, sad, happy, sad. I am so frustrated and yet hope-filled. Thrilled and scared. Rollercoaster madness. Argh...can someone give me advice without knowing what the hell is wrong? Just....blah! __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

08-09-2007, 06:19 PM	#347
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	sighs I am low today. I went out with my friend for a drink after a meeting last night (the friend I've mentioned before, the one I am head over heels in love with :P). I haven't said anything to hm about the way I feel, because I am not sure where he's at on the whole getting involved thing. So I did a little digging in my conversation with him. Ha. I know where he's at, I spent the last 5 years happily detemined to remain uninvolved. Of course, that's before I spent several months working closely with a friend of 3 years, and then unexpectedly fell in love. He's still in that place, y'know. He's had a girlfriend since his divorce, but he ended it after a year, because she 'wanted to be number one in his life' and that place is occupied by his son. Since then he's been studiously avoiding getting involved. I knew some of this already. Thing is, there may come a time, when someone will flick that switch with him, and he'll want to get involved...like he flicked that switch with me...but, clearly, it hasn't happened yet, therefore it isn't me that'll change his mind on this. So, I am trying to get my head around it and just try to stop seeing him in that way, just try and continue being his good friend, cause having him as a friend, well it isn't nothing y'know? I am just a little devastated though, by the realisation that it ain't ever goin to be. I don't fall in love easy or often...I've never felt so drawn to a person, my entire life. I'll get over it. But it sucks.

08-09-2007, 07:03 PM	#350
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Oh..and I want a cigarette. I really, really want a fucking cigarette. I was doing okay on the not smoking thing, I even stopped using the nicotine gum after the second week, but today I've wound myself up and now I really, really want a cig.

08-09-2007, 07:13 PM	#352
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Actually, I think that's the first I've mentioned it. Which is unusual for me. Usually when I stop smoking, its all I can talk about for the first few days at least :P

08-09-2007, 07:30 PM	#354
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Could he make the picture look like my friend? :P

08-10-2007, 01:21 PM	#357
LabRat twatfaced two legged bumhole Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 3,143	Try these. __________________ Strength does not come from how much weight you can lift, or how many miles you can run. It comes from knowing that you set a goal, and rose to the challenge. Strength comes from within.

08-10-2007, 02:43 PM	#358
Deuce Pesky Pugalist [sp] Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 191	my silent phone

08-11-2007, 06:10 AM	#359
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	I wrecked one of my mag wheels. WAAAAHHHHH Some dumbfuck driving a Ftruck tried to pull out into traffic in front of me and I had no where to go but into the concrete tram island.

08-12-2007, 04:26 PM	#360
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Yah, boo sucks to fucking Summer. There....that clear enough? Mum (who lives half way down the hill from me)* went on holiday yesterday morning for a week...two of my best friends (my ex and a mutual friend who is now his new girlfriend) went to Prague this morning for five days. My friend, from earlier in this thread, has gone to ground (I think he's probably in Tyneside). I've also been trying to get hold of another friend and comrade for past two days, just found out this aft she's in fucking Nice. Y'know, I can go days without seeing people and that's fine...but knowing that hardly any of the people I might normally phone (or be phoned by) for a chat, or call in for a coffee, are around, all of a sudden all I want is fucking company. Go figure. Hate this. Been fighting off this 'left behind' feeling all fricken day. I knew it was comin actually, because mum and the two J's I knew were going away. Bollox. I do quite well by myself unless I know I don't have a choice but to be by myself at which point I am rubbish at it. Probably doesn't help that I'm already borderline depressed to start with (seriously limits the people I'd voluntarily interract with at the best of times). Been doin the whole manic to on the floor, and back to manic again roller coaster all frikken week. And wouldn'y y'just know this weekend would be a slow one in the Cellar.....why? Because everyone's out enjoying the Summer.** Thank God for Sundae Girl, that's what I say, an hour long phone conversation helped ground me. I don't mean an hour of me saying how pissed off i am : An hour of just normal chit chat. * I live at the top of the hill, in the center of the village; halfway down the hill lives my mum; at the bottom of the hill live my brother and his family, and my friend/ex. Seriously, it's like at some point my living arrangements took on a nursery rhyme aspect. **Yes I know... I live in a beautiful part of the country and have a dog and therefore ample reason to be out enjoying the Summer, and indeed I have done precisely that for portions of the day, but right now I'm wallowing in self-pity, so bleh.

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