Funny/Embarrassing things they say

[footfootfoot]

Apart from he's hitting me...

[DucksNuts]

Addison, aged 3..."Ohhh, thats a cool car its got stripes like a race car is it a race car? its like bumblebee wow cool ITS A TRANSFORMER!! DOES IT TRANSFORM?? it can try it can learn cool can I drive it?"

Punctuation absent coz thats how he was talking.

[LabRat]

This isn't something she said, but did. Who doesn't love playing in a good old fashioned downpour? I can't not laugh when I watch this. What a goofball.

[regular.joe]

surely brightened my day. Thanks!

[Sundae]

I had to turn my laptop sideways... but yes, it's very cute.
Come visit us! We're having the rainiest July anyone can remember (well, people with 11 month memories who don't remember the floods last year!)

[glatt]

I thought, "eh, that's cute, but I guess you really have to be the Mom to appreciate it" and then she started the little dance, and I laughed out loud.

[PIMPnazT]

Coming home from work one evening, I was ready to get out of my attire and slip into my "slob" clothes. I had just unzipped my pants and decided to bend over, as I am rummaging through the pile of clean clothes I had pulled out of the dryer, my upper ass area is revealed, so my then two-year old tells me, "Mommee! You need to put your butt up."

[Irishmama22]

So, we'd gotten a new puppy who loved 'going' in the house. Needless to say, it drove me crazy! Typically, I'd rant about the little *&%$ dog and tell the little ones to let it outside.
Forward to Irishgrandmama coming for a visit, and on cue the puppy goes...in the house...again. Irishlad(3 yrs) verifies that there is indeed a mess by shouting, " That damn dog shit again!"
Calmly, Irishgrandmama replies, "Now, lad, what would your mother say?"
To which Irishlad responds...

"She'd say, ' PUT THAT FUCKING DOG OUTSIDE!!!'"

[BigV]

:snort:

[imagined conversation]
Ahem, son, come here lad.... If you're big enough to use those words, you're big enough to know when and how...
[/embarassed]

Preeeeettttttyyyyy dang funny, tho.

[Clodfobble]

We almost had the birds and the bees conversation with my stepson yesterday. He was asking the typical questions, and I was leading into the topic--and then I said the word "genes," and this apparently reminded him of something that happened in a Pokemon game. He rambled excitedly about the "genes of an ancient Pokemon ancestor," and then dashed out of the room.

Er, okay. Guess we'll have that talk another time.

[footfootfoot]

The inch has been hanging around the jobsite the last few days and his self appointed job is the keep the minions out of mischief. Since I blew out my rotator cuff (before Flint, the copycat) I have enlisted the help of a couple of strapping youths the help with the ongoing moneypit saga.

Anyway the inch has dubbed himself "mischief hammer" and is doing his rounds to keep everyone on the up and up. When I left one day he said to the guys "Hey Foot left, we can do mischief!" (As his self appointed position was to keep the guys out of mischief, this is a bit out of character...)
David: What kind of mischief should we do?
Inch: We could cut all the boards too long.
D: What else do you think we could do?
I: We should take apart the whole house!


Last month, after his cast came off, we were driving in the car and he told me "There was a guy who broke both his arms and both his legs and he had to walk around on his penis! People would look at him and say 'Do you have a foot on the end of your penis?' and he'd say 'Yes.' Isn't that crazy?"

Today he was up on a ten foot ladder and started screaming "HELP! HELP!" This is a kid who has been climbing on scaffolding since he was two, it's his jungle gym. So I look up and wonder WTF? "What's The matter?" I ask him.

(panic) "There's a japanese beetle stuck in my ear!"
(calm reason) "How did a Japanese beetle get stuck in your ear?"
(milder panic) "I put my (we'll come back to this later) Japanes beetle in my ear, and now he's stuck"
(calm, growing annoyed) "Why did you put a Japanese beetle in you ear?"
(simpering) "I thought it would be funny, but it isn't."
I airlift him off the ladder and we march upstairs, I get my trusty old roachcli, I mean hemostat, and grab the last visible leg in his ear canal, and yank the thing out.

Later on I quizzed him about "his" Japanese beetle.
"Whose Japanese beetle was that?"
"It was nobody's; It belonged to the garden."

[BigV]

You have an interesting life, footfootfoot. I'm staying tuned.

[Juniper]

At 10 and 12, mine are pretty much past the age of those cute little zingers. Of course there are still some funny things they say. Like my 12 year old girl told me a few days ago not to worry, she had the whole "boyfriend" thing sorted out, that she totally understood guys, and they would be no problem at all, ever. :snort:

But the best thing right now is these little private jokes we have between us. Silly stuff that nobody else would ever "get" to laugh at, but always cracks us up.

[Flint]

We were beginning an episode of Quantum Leap when the girl started humming the Star Trek: Next Generation theme song...so we asked her if she wanted to watch "her Star Treks" and she said "Yesss!"

So, you never know what they're going to mimic, but we're in the middle of the episode when she blurts out "Battle stations!" We're so proud.

[lookout123]

stories like that give me a more complete picture of who you are flint.

that is why i like the cellar.