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06-03-2009, 09:06 AM | #4096 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
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that's an awful lot of justification.......
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The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
06-03-2009, 09:19 AM | #4097 | |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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Yah. But it really was far too hot. The downside of being out in the sun for me is quite nasty. Even wearing visored hat (my leather flat cap) to shield my face and long sleeves to protect my arms. I was a mess when I got back from Leeds on Monday. And it was much hotter yesterday.
I think it may be time to dig out the electric fans.
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06-03-2009, 09:33 AM | #4098 |
Your Bartender
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
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And your rescheduled appointment is for . . . . when?
(Yeah, I know a slight bit about dental rationalization.) |
06-03-2009, 07:48 PM | #4100 | |
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
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I still had a bit of infection left and I learned the meaning of the line,'cruel to be kind'. |
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06-03-2009, 08:06 PM | #4101 | |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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Oh, I had a course of antibiotics from the hospital. This was if it flared back up before I got to see them.
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06-04-2009, 11:09 AM | #4102 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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i just got back from my new psych and I am more depressed than ever.
he wants to put me on 1000mg of a medicine that makes you WANT TO EAT and is practically guaranteed to make you gain weight. SO, they weighed me to see my starting point. I weigh more now than I ever have IN MY LIFE. I'm NOT taking the drugs, I'm NOT going to any fucking group, and I'm NOT going back. to say I loathe myself is an understatement. I cancelled my appt with my onco because, frankly, i don't give a shit if the cancer comes back, I'm NOT going to be VP for a student assoc. on campus (it's a fucking mess of an organization anyway) and I'm NOT going to see anybody today. Or tomorrow. I'm just going to sit here and despise the fucking gross idiot asshole that I am.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
06-04-2009, 11:47 AM | #4103 |
™
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
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Try to cut yourself some slack Bri. From where I'm sitting, there's nothing to loathe.
You know on an intellectual level that this is temporary, right? You're going to get through this. |
06-04-2009, 11:54 AM | #4104 |
Your Bartender
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
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Bri, I won't tell you to get up and go somewhere today. But try to give yourself SOMETHING to distract your mind. Music always worked for me. YMMV.
I'm not a psychiatrist, but there are at least a dozen antidepressants on the market these days, and it's hard to believe there isn't one that doesn't carry a weight gain side effect. If you told him about your weight gain concern and he ignored it, I say it's time for a new doctor. (Hopefully one that will not only take your weight concern into account, but also has experience dealing with psychological aftereffects of cancer.) |
06-04-2009, 12:24 PM | #4105 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
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Bri, concentrate on the good? What are some good things in your life, right now? Like name three?
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06-04-2009, 12:54 PM | #4106 |
Gone and done
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808
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And Bri, let me (hopefully gently) urge you to reconsider the Onc appointment. You will feel better some day -- maybe not tomorrow, but someday soon. And then you don't want to be blind-sided by the big C again.
Sure, ditch the student assoc -- you don't owe them anything. But you do owe yourself proper medical care. Please?
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per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not. |
06-04-2009, 04:42 PM | #4107 |
is fleeing the scene
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Beautiful CO
Posts: 1,510
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What they said Bri. Try to maybe find something in your life that you DO feel good about and immerse yourself in it for the time being.
And agreed about the Onc. We need you around here, so FUCK CANCER. Kick it's arse.
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Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six. |
06-04-2009, 04:49 PM | #4108 | |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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*hugs* Sorry you're feeling shit Bri. It'll pass. It must. The others' advice seems sound to me. There must be other options in terms of anti-depressants. But try to stay well whilst you ride this one out. You'll be glad of it when you get clear, which you will. Like every thing else this horrible feeling will just be a memory soon enough.
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06-05-2009, 08:07 AM | #4109 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
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Hey Bri, maybe your onco can point you in the direction of a psych who will better understand where you're coming from? Please reschedule that appt for a day when you're more ready to kick ass -there's too much C going around as it is.
and when you're feeling more feisty... Did you tell the psych that you weren't going to take the new drug? or did you lie and say you'd try it? because if the latter, call them and tell them actually, no I'm not going to take this, give me something that'll work for all aspects of my life, and if the former, dump him and get a new new psych
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The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
06-05-2009, 10:22 AM | #4110 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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I'm going to call him and tell him NO WAY am I taking this drug at the weight I am at currently. I took myself off prozac about 2 months ago and I'm going to put myself back on it (started today) as I have some refills of it.
I won't go into all the details, but it's very difficult for me to exercise (I walk that terrier everyday and it KILLS my legs and back, but I do it) but my eating habits suck huge big macs and taco bells. I eat like shit. I know this. I have to change it. this is my second 'new' psych doc in four months. the first new one put me on abilify which costs 500.00/month (which my ins. co.won't cover) and when I called to tell them I needed something else they said, "It'll take six weeks for you to get an appointment" so WTF? I had just seen him, he just needed to write a new, cheaper script! This new guy is nice and seems to care, but...ain't no way I"m taking depakote 1000mg and gain 40 more pounds. Frankly, I'd rather have a cross town bus hit me than gain one more ounce. I will tell them that. They can do whatever they want with that info. I'm finding it hard to care about anything at all. I don't care if I do my paper, I don't care if I take a shower, I don't care if I die. gee, maybe in six weeks, after the prozac starts to kick in, I'll give a shit. This feeling is like zombiefication. I cannot wait to see what my othello paper looks like. Hilarious, I'm sure. oh, and someone I kinda depended on has just given me the bums rush. everything , EVERYTHING is over. so many undeserving, happy people die...and here I am. Life is a joke.
__________________
In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
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