What's upsetting you today?

[morethanpretty]

myself
1) i have no one (other than family) to celebrate my birthday with
2) i was mean to my g-ma over an e-mail forward. idk, i've tried in the past to respond reasonable and tell her why she should not fw those things, gave her links to snopes, ect. she didn't stop, so i just stopped looking at them until the other day when she sent me this one. CLICK HERE
i sent her back a harsh reply, that she should be ashamed to spread such rascist lies and bigotry, that she should be more responsible, ect ect. she sent back reply that she was sorry and she'd deleted me from her contacts so i won't get her fws anymore. i shouldv'e called to apologize, i didn't. she called me today, left a message that she wants to apologize and to call her back. i haven't yet. although i know that i should not have been so harsh with her, i also believe i'm right.

[DanaC]

Right or wrong, you should allow her to apologise. She might be reallly worried she's offended/angered you. Not calling her back, will seem like that apology is being flung back in her face. If you think you were overly harsh, then say so. You can say it in a way that doesn't negate your overall objection. The fight against racism and bigotry does not begin with, nor is it served by, making your gran feel small.

On a lighter note: Happy Birthday m'dear.

[Flint]

Happy Birthday, MTP. Come to my house (in Texas) and we'll throw you a party.

I have seen big family blow ups over my sister telling people to please stop sending countless non-substantive forwards like "lol me too" etc. on a family email distribution list, and explaining that her phone is constantly going off with every email and none of them say anything useful. Of course, she was perceived to be "in the wrong" and the response was something similar to what you got of, "fine, I'll remove your address" rather than the offended parties stopping to think "I shouldn't be using an email chain to transit pointless instant message/chat room-type comments."

[DanaC]

Pssst: is mtp.

Her gran obviously doesn't share her view of these emails as wrong. But she is respecting her views by removing her from the forwarding circle.

You can't always change people. Sometimes you just have to accept that that's who they are. I have friends who hold racist views. occasionally they send me racist jokes in text messages. I occasionally tackle it in a gentle way. Mostly I just ignore it. It doesn't really serve much purpose to try and change them. Just hurts them or you: even more so if there is a large generation gap.

[morethanpretty]

Originally Posted by DanaC

Right or wrong, you should allow her to apologise. She might be reallly worried she's offended/angered you. Not calling her back, will seem like that apology is being flung back in her face. If you think you were overly harsh, then say so. You can say it in a way that doesn't negate your overall objection. The fight against racism and bigotry does not begin with, nor is it served by, making your gran feel small.

On a lighter note: Happy Birthday m'dear.

Sorry, I didn't mean that I wouldn't accept her apology. I just wasn't sure how to handle it, I know I owed her one too for being so harsh, but not because I was wrong about the forward. I did call, it was a short convo, but we agreed to forgive and forget. I tried to be gentle and tell her that she doesn't have to send those forwards on, there is no obligation. I don't know why she feels like there is. I guess I should be more mad at the people who send my gma that shit. She's not stupid by all means, but she has a lack of education and that information kinda overwhelms her, she has a hard time sorting it out truth from fiction I think. *Sigh* Its getting more and more difficult for me to handle the people that I love dearly, but have such different beliefs than I do.

Thanks dana and flint for the bday wishes. I tried to get my mom to take me to the Ft. Worth zoo for my bday but she says the weather is gonna be too nasty . We're goin to Dallas Aquarium instead. I'm hoping to catch the shark feeding.

[Nirvana]

HBD MTP. My mother sends me that kinda trash but I ignore the content and just realize she has something to do and that makes her happy. I don't think she reads half the crap she sends me or else she would not be sending it. Not talking to her because she is sending crap I don't agree with would be worse than her sending the crap.

[jinx]

My old friend from childhood that I reconnected with on facebook still sends me right wing religious crap after me twice asking her not to. She can't bother to compose an email to me about herself - just wants to make sure I know she's jeebus' BFF.
Just backs my belief that religion is a mental illness.

[skysidhe]

Happy birthday MTP!

I think it is good your grandma is reaching out and she doesn't seem defensive.


As for the texting and the posting in lieu of a real friendship.

I don't like for my friends to constantly text me without the intention of having a real conversation. To me constant texting is like graffiti. It doesn't tell me anything about the person nor contributes to a friendship. I hate it. I am not talking about the occasional text. I am taking about things like, "I feel really bad today...._ blank."
"I am worried about so and so....__blank." " I am going here to do this or that.....__blank." Just statements without the desire or acknowledgment of any response. Finally I am WTF...You can call me if you want to talk or I'll call you but still. ___blank * crickets *

After repeated attempts asking for a normal conversation I put my foot down. ( phone down?)

One friend is offended and one friend made it right.

One 30 minute conversation with your best friend is worth a thousand simple texts.

Also extremist emails are the same as extremist talk. I stand the drama or the fear mongering. Whatever you want to call it

I think some religion is whacked. I don't think all religions are though. Some people can have one and not over spiritualize every daily occurrence.

I am not sure about political extremists though.

[squirell nutkin]

The inchling is under the weather today, listless and nearly immobile, now in bed. It's odd that when his energy level is up to 11 I wish he'd chill out, but when he's down to zero I realize that 11 is normal and healthy.

[skysidhe]

Originally Posted by squirell nutkin

The inchling is under the weather today, listless and nearly immobile, now in bed. It's odd that when his energy level is up to 11 I wish he'd chill out, but when he's down to zero I realize that 11 is normal and healthy.

I know it's hard to see them not feeling well.

Well wishes out to the small one.

[squirell nutkin]

Thanks.

[DanaC]

Poor li'l inchling. How's he doing today, any better?

[Griff]

Happy bday MTP.

Originally Posted by jinx

My old friend from childhood that I reconnected with on facebook still sends me right wing religious crap after me twice asking her not to. She can't bother to compose an email to me about herself - just wants to make sure I know she's jeebus' BFF.
Just backs my belief that religion is a mental illness.

I'm pretty brisk with the trash can anymore. No reply no commentary just silence... kinda like troll wrangling.

[SamIam]

Originally Posted by skysidhe

I think some religion is whacked. I don't think all religions are though. Some people can have one and not over spiritualize every daily occurrence.

There are many people who have faith who don't wear their religion on their sleeve. I consider my belief to be a personal matter, and I have no interest in trying to force it on others. It is unfortunate that all Christians are often placed in the same catagory as the fundie nutters.

[DanaC]

I think that's a fair point. However, it seems to be a trend that affects more than just Christians. Moslems get lumped in together. So do atheists.