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02-28-2013, 09:39 AM | #9046 |
Werepandas - lurking in your shadows
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: In the Deep South
Posts: 3,408
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She has blown the custody agreement out of the water. #1 There is to be no tobacco usage in the presence of Addie. She's smoking like a chimney & he's dipping left & right. #2 There is to be no alcohol consumed in the presence of Addie. She & Jay have Addie fetching beers out of the fridge for them. #3 There are to be no overnight romantic guests. She is shacked up with him. She even listed his address as her permanent address on her income tax. #4 She is to carry primary insurance on Addie. She never has, I provide the only insurance for Addie. #5 She prevented me from seeing Addie at Christmas when the court order expressly orders I am to have Addie from Dec 20 - 25th at noon (even years)
Yes, I am livid or seething or whatever verb you might want to use to express being extremely pissed off.
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Give a man a match, & he'll be warm for 20 seconds. But toss that man a white phosphorus grenade and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
02-28-2013, 10:29 AM | #9047 |
Knight of the Oval-Shaped Conference Table
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Vernon, BC, Canada
Posts: 378
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Can you use the "in imminent danger" from her violation of the smoking agreement, afterall your child is in the hospital with unknown ailments. How are you to know its not from the second hand smoke? If you go to a lawyer/school whatever tell them she is in the hospital. Might light a fire under them.
No idea, but just thought of it. Sorry you have to go through this, no parent that WANTS to be part of thier childs life should not get the chance to. Your EX is really hurting herself in later years, Addie is not dumb, she will see through it all when she gets older. |
02-28-2013, 10:50 AM | #9048 | |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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Quote:
Stop at the nurse's station first and ask about her, what's happening with her. Be a panda. Leave King Kong in the parking lot, he can be called in whenever you need him, but don't let him lead your visit. Don't be a jerk, don't call attention to yourself, don't get freaked out. Seeing her will make you feel better, and make her feel better too. Finding out what the heck's going on will too, but that comes from the doctors and nurses. Don't sneak, Addie will reveal you eventually. Just go see her, find out what's going on. Be cool.
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Be Just and Fear Not. |
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02-28-2013, 11:24 AM | #9049 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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For what it's worth, Sarge, if she withholds visitation again at a time clearly specified as yours (not just agreed to verbally,) you can call the cops for custodial interference--i.e. kidnapping. Just keep a copy of your custody order in your car at all times so you'll be ready to present it upon request. Obviously this will escalate things, so you have to decide if you're prepared for that, but you do NOT have to wait to get on a docket if she is refusing visitation.
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02-28-2013, 11:34 AM | #9050 |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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Keeping your documents with you DOES help.
I recently had a long standing problem in this area resolved by virtue of showing my copy of my documentation to the person who said he was unable to help me. After seeing what the court said, and showing it to his supervisor, I got what I was entitled to. My copies of the facts trumped what was in their system, and the obstruction by the other party was overcome.
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02-28-2013, 01:28 PM | #9051 |
Werepandas - lurking in your shadows
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: In the Deep South
Posts: 3,408
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Noncustodial interference is a felony in MS. Officers refuse to act on a custody agreement. They will only intervene if the court issues an order. That is standard throughout our state now. I even had it written in my policy & procedures matter at the PD.
Last time I was called out on one of these, it was the grandparents witholding a child from their own daughter. Grandmother was arrested after a brief barricade situation. The grandfather then attempted suicide and I had to shoot him with a taser. Sound advice from all. I called her other grandfather and he arranged for me to talk to Addie on the phone while the wicked ex had run home to take a shower. I feel better. I won't go to the hospital and risk a confrontation aroud Addie. BTW, Addie has a stomach virus and had become dehydrated. Please don't take offense if I seem snippy about what can be done with custody. Every state & even jurisdiction is different. Our local agencies refuse to get involved. The reasoning is the status of the custody agreement. Has it been modified or changed and we are only seeing one that is favorable to that parent? Also there is tremendous liability if an officer screws up and gives the child to the wrong parent. The officer then could be charged with infringement of civil rights or evan custodial interference
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Give a man a match, & he'll be warm for 20 seconds. But toss that man a white phosphorus grenade and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
02-28-2013, 02:25 PM | #9052 |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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you're not snippy. and I'm no expert at the law, certainly not in some other jurisdiction. I am a veteran parent and an experienced divorcee. I am also your friend.
You do what you gotta do man.
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Be Just and Fear Not. |
02-28-2013, 02:50 PM | #9053 |
Werepandas - lurking in your shadows
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: In the Deep South
Posts: 3,408
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Thank you to all for the good advice. I'm becoming agitated and I know I need to take meds and chill out.
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Give a man a match, & he'll be warm for 20 seconds. But toss that man a white phosphorus grenade and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
03-02-2013, 12:41 PM | #9054 |
polaroid of perfection
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
Posts: 24,185
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OMG. So sorry Sarge.
And you went through this while I was sleeping. Pretty much everyone here has more experience in these situations than I do. All I can offer is silent love and supoort. In that respect at least, consider it done.
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Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac |
03-02-2013, 02:02 PM | #9055 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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^wss.
my heart goes out to you and Addie. Why do people have to be suck fucks?
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
03-04-2013, 11:46 AM | #9056 |
Glutton for Gluttony
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 1,409
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Today is my mom's 49th birthday.
She's been in and out of the doctor's, lately -- every test under the sun. She's been losing incredible amounts of weight -- she's now down to 116 lbs, what she weighed as an 18 year old. She told me today that they found something "abnormal" with her kidneys. She gets results on Thursday. I haven't been able to see her since last spring, and she has yet to meet her granddaughter. Prayers, positive energy, good wishes, happy vibes -- whatever you've got in your arsenal -- greatly appreciated. |
03-04-2013, 11:49 AM | #9057 |
Back in 10
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
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I hope they find out soon what is ailing your mom Choc.
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03-04-2013, 12:12 PM | #9058 |
polaroid of perfection
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
Posts: 24,185
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What I got you're welcome to have.
I think Dads is down to his lowest weight since puberty. No-one seems concerned 'cept Mum & me. All my love and wishes.
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Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac |
03-04-2013, 12:15 PM | #9059 |
Not Suspicious, Merely Canadian
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,774
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Sending prayers and good wishes, Choco.
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03-04-2013, 12:26 PM | #9060 |
™
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
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I'm sorry Choco!
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