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#376 |
Pithy Euphemist
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 19
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Marriage quotes
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters. Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit. Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever. Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings": * The Engagement Ring * The Wedding Ring * The Suffe-Ring * The Endu-Ring |
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#377 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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A man walks into a sex shop and tells the woman behind the counter he's looking for a blow up doll.
The woman asks "Would you like a christian or muslim doll?" Confused the man says "What's the difference?" "Well," replies the woman, "the muslim one blows herself up!"
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#378 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Mommy, Mommy, what happened to all your scabs?
Shut up, and eat your corn flakes.
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#379 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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Who were the world's fastest readers?
The World Trade Center employees. Reason: They can go through dozens of stories in less than 10 seconds.
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#380 |
Master of the Domain
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 225
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On one fine night, Charlie Chaplin went to fancy dress competition............He won seventh prize!!!
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smoke on the water |
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#381 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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Daddy, I need to poo.
NO Daddy, I need to poo. NO Daddy, I need to poo. OK, I'll take my dick out.
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#382 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Well, it did say tasteless jokes.
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#383 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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That's why I posted it here.
And although it's tasteless, I dare say it leaves a shitty taste in the mouth.
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#384 | |
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
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Quote:
![]() I think you won the thread! ![]()
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby |
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#385 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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I'm happy to have brought you a bit of fun.
I'm usually a winner when it comes to tasteless jokes ![]()
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#386 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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Daddy,Daddy,why is Mummy running right and left through the garden?
Shut the fuck up and give me another magazine!
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#387 |
Pithy Euphemist
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 19
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A Chew Toy For The First Dog
Among those who will receive gifts from the Obamas this Christmas is Bo, the First Dog. The Obamas will give Bo a chew toy. Coincidentally, this is also the same present they will give Joe Biden. |
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#388 |
Master Locutor
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Iowa
Posts: 155
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Whats the difference between pink and purple? Your grip.
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#389 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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A young boy comes to his father:
"Daddy, I've just made love!" "Oh! Really?! And when will you do it again?" "Well, I don't really know, my asshole is very sore..."
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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#390 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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Q: What do you do after shaking the hand of a leper?
A: You give it back
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"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce |
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humor |
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