03-02-2011, 10:55 AM | #3901 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
03-04-2011, 11:03 PM | #3902 |
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
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Irony Lake
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03-04-2011, 11:19 PM | #3903 |
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
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A simple question. lol'z
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03-06-2011, 02:38 AM | #3904 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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I haven't gotten to pouting yet. I'm still sulking. You'll just have to wait.
Am I doing it right? Is it sulk then pout, or pout then sulk? This 'giving a shit' is getting complicated.
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03-06-2011, 03:54 AM | #3905 |
Master Dwellar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,197
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wait. did i do this right? *takes sip of beer and doesn;t spill or dribble it* was that right? i think i did do something wrong. the damn can is now empty! sheesh! guess i;ll have to keep practicing.
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03-07-2011, 03:16 PM | #3906 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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I have that same problem with bottles...Ya got beer, ya got beer, then all of a sudden, ya ain't got no beer, WTF?
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03-07-2011, 05:56 PM | #3907 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
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A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand, selling ties..
The Taliban asked, "Do you have water?" The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only £5." The Taliban shouted, "Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first! "OK," said the old Jewish man, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom." Cursing, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead & said "Your f****ing brother won't let me in without a tie!"
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03-07-2011, 07:57 PM | #3908 |
Back in 10
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
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.
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Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind. |
03-07-2011, 08:17 PM | #3909 |
Doctor Wtf
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
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"Now would you like to buy a tie? They're £10."
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Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl. |
03-07-2011, 10:14 PM | #3910 |
Back in 10
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
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.
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Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind. |
03-08-2011, 09:53 AM | #3911 |
Master Dwellar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,197
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Blondes Explaining Easter
This could be the ultimate blonde joke Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him what Easter represented. The first blonde, an American, said "Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast and we give thanks and eat turkey." St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and wouldn't let her in. The second blonde, a Brit, said "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus's birth and exchange gifts." St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he wouldn't let her in either. The third blonde, a Canadian, said she knew what Easter was, and St.Peter said, "So, tell me." She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with his disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans hung him on the cross and eventually he died. Then they buried him in a tomb behind a very large boulder ... " St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good." Then the blonde continued, "Now, every year the Jews roll away the boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of hockey." St. Peter fainted.
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03-08-2011, 10:50 AM | #3912 |
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
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Posts: 6,828
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haha Funny one's classic and plthi
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03-08-2011, 11:29 AM | #3913 |
Professor
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Brest (FRANCE)
Posts: 1,837
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Can you explain that one to a poor French guy?
I guess that there's some cultural reference that I don't get.
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03-08-2011, 11:43 AM | #3914 |
Master Dwellar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,197
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we have ground hog day here. if the ground hog, phil i think?, sees his shadow he goes back in his hole because there will be 6 more weeks of winter. so here the blonde was referring to jesus as a ground hog
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For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream. |
03-08-2011, 11:56 AM | #3915 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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Yes and you should see the movie Groundhog Day with Andie McDowell and, umm, that guy who was in that other movie with those guys from that show...
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