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Old 01-25-2012, 10:13 PM   #4396
classicman
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
 
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A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.
She put on her robe and went downstairs. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him.
He appeared to be deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She saw him wipe a tear from his eye and take a sip of his coffee.
"What's the matter dear? Why are you down here at this time of night?" she asked.
"Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating and you were only 16?" he asked.
"Yes I do." she replied. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?"
"Yes I remember." "Do you remember your father when he shoved that shotgun in my face and said.
"Either you marry my daughter or spend twenty years in jail?"
"Yes I do", she replied. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,
"You know I would have gotten out today."
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Old 01-25-2012, 10:30 PM   #4397
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...
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Old 01-25-2012, 10:31 PM   #4398
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Old 01-26-2012, 11:35 AM   #4399
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Old 01-27-2012, 04:19 PM   #4400
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That'd be funnier if wasn't true.
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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Old 01-30-2012, 10:49 AM   #4401
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This one as well Grav ...
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Old 01-30-2012, 11:30 AM   #4402
jimhelm
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reminds me of that note that I found in a deal....

'do not deposit this check
customer will replace it with
a Cash Years check when they
pick up the car.

-Juan'
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Old 01-30-2012, 11:40 AM   #4403
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reminds me of this old classic
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Old 01-30-2012, 01:25 PM   #4404
jimhelm
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I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!

He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'

So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'
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Old 01-30-2012, 03:38 PM   #4405
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Sick, sick, sick - but
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Old 01-30-2012, 11:28 PM   #4406
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'

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Old 01-30-2012, 11:46 PM   #4407
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sarge? is that you?
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Old 02-03-2012, 12:38 PM   #4408
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Old 02-03-2012, 12:48 PM   #4409
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very interesting!
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:06 PM   #4410
classicman
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