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#5896 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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That happened at the house across the street from ours, about 15-ish years ago. Dude was having a mental health crisis and threatening suicide (which apparently was common for him), wife was out and called the cops to check on him. A beat officer knocked on the door and a single shot was fired.
12 hours, 1 SWAT team, and an evacuated street later, they finally stormed the house to find that the one shot had been the guy committing suicide. He hadn't even known it was a cop at the door. |
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#5897 |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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A young American man moves to the Shetland Isles. Unbeknownst to him, the Shetland peoples are quite reserved, and no-one visits him for three months.
One stormy night, there's a loud knock at the door. He opens the door to the sight of a huge, fiery-haired man with a thick beard. With an accent equally as thick, the visitor says, "I've come to invite ye to a party." "Wonderful," says the American, "I'd love to go!" "I must warn ye, lad. The drinks will be flowin' aplenty." "That's no problem, I've been known to enjoy a strong scotch now and again," replies the American. "They'll likely be a fight too," says the bearded man. "Where there's drinkin' and dancin' there's always a fight." "I'm not worried, I was middleweight champion in boxing back in the navy. I'm sure I can hold my own." "Alright, lad. But one last thing. There's likely to be sex involved too. Hairy-arsed, drunken sex." The American smirks. "Well, after being alone for so many months, that's not out of the question either. One question though: what should I wear?" The big man chuckles and replies, "Ah, come as you are, it's just gonna be you and me."
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Be Just and Fear Not. |
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#5898 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Apologies if this is a repeat:
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#5899 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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I remember some of these statement. Hell, I probably made some of them.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5900 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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At least it's red...
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5901 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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Fake news...
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5902 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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So long EMeekins98, we hardly knew ye...
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#5903 |
Junior Master Dwellar
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Buckinghamshire UK
Posts: 4,059
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That's such a shame. Just when I was developing an interest in Polish electrical vehicles as well.
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#5904 |
still says videotape
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
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His life was short and beautiful.
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If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis |
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#5905 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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For polish electrical vehicles life is short, fire, ash.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5906 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
|
__________________
![]() These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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#5907 |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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__________________
Be Just and Fear Not. |
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#5908 |
Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Southern California
Posts: 6,674
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Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course. |
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#5909 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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In Europe you can have a whirlwind courtship in a long day...
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5910 |
still says videotape
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
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Why drive to Germany when you're already in Austria?
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If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis |
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humor |
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