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Old 04-15-2013, 04:50 PM   #1036
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
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It might not be your hands that need washing...
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Old 04-15-2013, 09:16 PM   #1037
elSicomoro
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I keep my body clean...I bathe at least once a week.
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Old 04-15-2013, 10:41 PM   #1038
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
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I mean it might not be YOUR hands that need washing.

The mm just finished a phase of wiping her ass on the shower curtain or almost anything other than toilet paper. There were a few instances of suspicious face cloths left where one would ordinarily expect a clean one.

I told her to knock it off. We'll see.
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Old 04-16-2013, 08:52 AM   #1039
Clodfobble
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Yesterday there was a guy standing by the road in a Guy Fawkes' mask with a giant cardboard sign that said "Honk if You Hate Taxes." It amused me because no one was honking, and he was getting really agitated trying to get people's attention at the stop light.
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Old 04-16-2013, 09:28 AM   #1040
glatt
 
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That made me smile. I can totally picture it.

I wish all nutters would just hold signs instead of blowing shit up.
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Old 04-16-2013, 09:42 AM   #1041
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
Yesterday there was a guy standing by the road in a Guy Fawkes' mask with a giant cardboard sign that said "Honk if You Hate Taxes." It amused me because no one was honking, and he was getting really agitated trying to get people's attention at the stop light.
Maybe the drivers read the sign, as I did...

"Honk if You Hate Texas."
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Old 04-16-2013, 10:10 AM   #1042
Undertoad
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We have fecal bacteria all over our bodies, really. You could have infected yourself in your sleep.
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Old 04-17-2013, 01:46 AM   #1043
elSicomoro
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Well, I did break my foot in my sleep...still haven't figured that one out...
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Old 04-17-2013, 05:22 PM   #1044
BigV
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Quote:
Originally Posted by footfootfoot View Post
I mean it might not be YOUR hands that need washing.

The mm just finished a phase of wiping her ass on the shower curtain or almost anything other than toilet paper. There were a few instances of suspicious face cloths left where one would ordinarily expect a clean one.

I told her to knock it off. We'll see.
Ew.

If it doesn't work, maybe you can get one of those rigid cone shaped collars for protecting a dog's ears from being scratched, and have her wear it as a skirt. Of course, that means you need to find alternate means of, well, you know.

Still. Ew. Good luck.
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Old 04-20-2013, 11:17 AM   #1045
infinite monkey
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Got Bob Marley on the youtube for work background music.

Remembering college, playing this album over and over, and my roommate and I calling Redemption Song "The Damn Chim Song." Because it sort of sounded like The Damn Chim Song, and we envisioned Chim as being a fun-loving little monkey who was always getting into trouble. "Damn Chim...dammit Chim...look what you've done."

Maybe you had to see it to be there.
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Old 04-20-2013, 01:18 PM   #1046
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sycamore View Post
Well, I did break my foot in my sleep...still haven't figured that one out...
See, that's why I keep a spare. They come in...handy.

TFIBHAW, try the Pig's Trotters!
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Old 04-21-2013, 08:06 AM   #1047
Lamplighter
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... with an imaginative ending

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Old 04-22-2013, 03:20 PM   #1048
Sundae
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Two things, both pretty childish.

Qestion on the quiz I watch every evening with the 'rents - some questions are harder than others and it's sometimes a case of speed over substance.

"A stuffed crust pizza is usually filled with what?"
Me and my poor hearing, and the fact the question was answered suitable fast made me swear he replied, "Jizz."

The onther night, we had a Police helicopter circling overhead. Crime can happen anywhere of course, but we always immediately think of the Younfg Offenders institute up the road. Which has an evil repuutation within the prison community apparently.

Anyway, Mum comes down in her nightie.
"Can you hear that helicopter circling?" she says.
"Yes," says I, "have you come to put the chain lock on?"
"No," says my nosey mother, AND WALKS OUTSIDE IN HER NIGHTIE TO GET A BETTER LOOK!"
"You'd be great in a horror film, Mum," I tell her, not unkindly.
When she goes back to bed I put the chain lock on, double check the back door and draw down the kitchen blind. Just in case.

It did make me giggle to myself though.
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Old 04-22-2013, 06:54 PM   #1049
Aliantha
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Pretty funny.
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Old 04-22-2013, 07:34 PM   #1050
jimhelm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sycamore View Post
My culture from my jacked-up eye came back today. It was not MRSA, which is great because that shit suuuuuuuucked.

It WAS E. Coli though...WTF?!
Well that explains your shitty outlook on things.
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