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Subject: Ten Truths About Life
Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one
can die.
Number 8 Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him
without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a
person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 Some people are like a Slinky ... Not really good for
anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down
the stairs.
Number 5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, laying in
hospitals dying of nothing.
Number 4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.
Number 3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a
substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?
Number 2 In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now
the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 TRUTH: 'Life is like a jar of jalapeņos. What you do
today, might burn your ass tomorrow.'
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I don't suffer from insanity...i enjoy every moment of it.
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